Remote Viewing Defense Against Reptilian Aliens, Overlords of Human-Abducting Aliens

Remote Viewing Defense Against Reptilian Aliens, Overlords of Human-Abducting Aliens

 By  Paul Schroeder

I used to firmly believe that we as predators, were at the very top of the food chain.

Then, others like me, who also claimed to be abductees, some of who I met through Budd Hopkins and his house get togethers many years ago told me horror stories about some abductions.

They had seen on-board craft, a Mothman alien race, an ‘in-charge’ being who radiated rage and hatred.

This satanic, diabolical alien being was overlord of many alien races who abduct humans and who pilot UFOS.

Muscular, winged, sentient, highly technological, upright standing to seven feet tall, monitor lizards governed large craft; reptilians who looked upon us as we fancied veal violated our World’s airspace every night…

(graphic: Earthfiles.com)

These abductees had even gleaned what reptoids regular diets consisted of..

Just as bad or even worse there was a spiritual/supernatural element, an ethereal placement of young reptilians along human abductees spinal chords for aural feasting; they trespass interdimensionally as well and tamper with our energies that extend there.

When these interdimensional cloaked unseen creatures violate and intrude within our aural/psychic energies, free-floating waves of anxiety blossom, the human soul’s natural reaction to intrusion; ask any psychic medium.

That explained why so many abductees had such horrid panic attacks and spinal issues, juvenile reptilian spinal attachments tamper with astral energies and causes somatic injuries..

Imagine a whole cityscape with most people walking around with an affixed juvenile reptilian attached upside-down to their spines; it lends a new meaning to a silent invasion.

 

It was a chilling story I was to hear repeatedly echoed.

“Aliens” have long been on and involved with this planet, eons BEFORE mankind showed up in an altered simian form, because reptoid’s selfish and cruel tactics required tampering with our DNA to create us, a naked ape crop to harvest, a simian race who knots neckties and who rides public conveyances.


After a lifetime of abductions and research I have gotten this hard fact from abductees who have actually had their questions answered by their abductors.

It re-framed correctly, at least to my mind, what the ulterior motive, purpose was behind many alien/mankind interaction/visitations.

We are a physical and spiritual crop to be harvested, as we do with lower Earth animal forms..

And it angered me to think how blind UFO sky-watchers and media focus simply on craft, like some alien-Jedi-mind-trick, and  not the intent of alien occupants, within.

It puts one in mind of a Twilight Zone episode called,”To Serve Man”, which neatly summed up man’s importance in the galaxy as a mere condiment.

(Director of CIA, Admiral R.H. Hillenkoetter: “It is time for the truth to be brought out in open Congressional hearings. Behind the scenes, high-ranking Air Force officers are soberly concerned about UFOs. But through official secrecy and ridicule, citizens are led to believe the unknown flying objects are nonsense. To hide the facts, the Air Force has silenced its personnel.” p. 58, quoted from New York Times, February 28, 1960, p. L30)

But Budd Hopkins’ abductees meetings ascertained that older abductees should not worry as our flesh is become too tough, old and tainted with drugs, chemicals and age ; only our very young become simian veal, for reptilian palates.

It makes one want to change, to make an apparent moral decision and assume a vegetarian diet and not ever atavistically revert;

but we too have mouths intended by evolution, equipped with meat tearing incisors…..

Who Could Ever Imagine Such Creatures ?

My abduction recalls were of different entities, also  masters of illusions, ones who tested me in mind-imposed scenarios, of moral dilemmas and survival values choices.

They calibrated souls and assessed minds with  uncanny, telepathic images projected onto the mind’s visual screen (i.e. the optic lobe).

They were tall, white like a refrigerator, flat like a Gumby cartoon character and often,  politely spoke mind to mind.

Years later, I saw a three foot tall juvenile reptilian entity,  during a shower, under the spray,  close up.

I saw it  partially appear and then slowly vanish, like an elf, and it cocked its head at me sideways, birdlike.

I was at once both horrified and in awe, frighteningly aware of their parasitic, bottom-feeder UFO- creature reputation, gleaned from other abductees.

The adults were winged Mothmen, cat-like eyes, scaled and ceiling tall, all quite demonically possessed, and I wanted nothing, whatsoever, to  imagine about them.

I  had stupidly (and recklessly) tried an energy experiment with my mind to control a UFO by remote viewing, a mind flexing field exercise to satisfy profound irritation for the copious nosebleeds, and nightmares sustained after abductions from devices inserted into my sinuses and mentally implanted ‘screen-memories’.

By virtue of the unexpected result, the semi- transparent appearance of a saurian monstrously tall reptilian in the center of my living room who radiated a loathsome palpable rage and hatred, shortly after I tried using this psychic technique, I determined that I would never alone try this mental exercise tool again,

However, a skilled ensemble TEAM, might, by contrast, bring this warrior marvelous results.

The unused power of our minds is part of the raw quantum physics of the universe> That energy potential has latent power, both miraculous and awesome, to be seen in this power flexing exercise.

The fact that it brought almost immediate retaliation against me underlines its potential efficacy.

Will You Attempt To Be as Foolhardy as I?

With  eyes closed, I did visualize an alien craft, a disc-shaped or cigar-shaped large UFO, and ‘saw’ it perched, then flying above our planet high within our skies, many miles overhead.

I visualized all quadrants of a very large craft, filled with overlord reptilians and subservient greys, all busy at machinery.

I studied the tiers and levels of it in full detail for a full half minute.

 

Then, I visualized that a force from my mind sharply hit the ship and jarred the craft violently, tossed into another section of space, like a football, end over end.

Clearly, I saw it hurled across a short distance in space, at a tilted pitched angle and visualized all entities on-board now suddenly very startled and frightened.

Imagination, is a word that should be eliminated from our language.

I augmented this visualization and used a quick head tilt to accentuate the strong mental suggestion of the craft’s jump.

I  totally forgot about this experimental exercise within an  hour.

But then between me on the couch and my television set, a creature from a nightmare appeared and changed my life.
There are moments that define one’s life, moments that one says, ‘this was before that’, ‘this was after that’.

A Mothman-like reptilian, a winged scaled saurian being, ceiling-high, semi- materialized.

Without moving I was suddenly warmed; hatred surrounded me with menace as though I were near a hot radiator.

Its cat-like eyes radiated a palpable loathing and rage, which awed me rather than frightened me as I had lost my senses to surprise.

It was winged, ceiling-high and scaled, with webbing between brown claws.

It vanished after less than five seconds .

Later, days and weeks later in my life, that saurian vendetta surely and without question manifested a series of horrid and painful accidents which seemed later to underline the smoldering, tangible hatred and rage that it had radiated towards me.

In retrospect, those agonies and sudden misfortunes were not worth the risk of what was after all a very foolhardy experiment.

But I couldn’t help but wonder how merely one single human mind could be such a powerful weapon/tool, to control alien craft, that do indeed respond to powerful telepathic messages.

And I later also couldn’t help but wonder what more a highly skilled group of focused minds, an orchestra of minds in unison, might also be able to accomplish.

We are not, as mindless and as helpless against these vile creatures and their miracle machines, as everyone has thought …

 

Editor’s Note:

Illustrations of reptilian aliens courtesy of

Linda Moulton Howe’s

http://www.Earthfiles.com 

(with permission)

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AN ALTERNATIVE PHILOSOPHY OF LIFE : A SPIRITUAL MESSAGE

AN ALTERNATIVE PHILOSOPHY OF LIFE : A SPIRITUAL MESSAGE

by Paul Schroeder

A spiritual message, in a time of need, illuminated a larger life path:
“The Spell of the Yukon”
               By Robert W. Service
“I wanted the gold, and I sought it;
   I scrabbled and mucked like a slave.
Was it famine or scurvy—I fought it;
   I hurled my youth into a grave.
I wanted the gold, and I got it—
   Came out with a fortune last fall,—
Yet somehow life’s not what I thought it,
   And somehow the gold isn’t all…”
I rarely ever worked overtime, or sought spare part- time jobs to make more money, seeking blue skies above to doing work indoors, and I relished my poorer beer pockets without ever developing or resenting the absence of a richer champagne taste.
Those ambitious lads of my childhood who entered finance, medicine or law,  worked 24-7 towards a salaried lifestyle that flew them first class, overseas to luncheon meetings and purchased them mansions in the  glass sky towers of Manhattan.
Effete, they would confess,”Those who say that money can’t buy you everything, don’t know where to shop!”
I  became a college instructor teacher who received a meager pittance, but though  I relished my bankers’ hours’ 9 to 3  job, I deeply longed for the respite of work, each academic year, within a ten week vacation, over the summer.
During academic semesters I recklessly ate up all of my sick days and personal days, taking escapes in the sun at the beach, and landscaped land escapes in three and four day weekends, at mountain lakes’ sites to hike in virgin woods alone.
Others in Higher Education had instead garnered many days, ‘in their bank’, saved up jealously, to trade for cash, losing one day for every two saved, upon retirement.
To me, counter intuitively, non providentially, time away to think was worth more, as an escape valve,  than half of some obscure future money.
Work was onerous and exacting, and freedom was a hiking-in-the-woods- relief, from fluorescent overhead lights, and the grinding grading of incessant exams and papers.
For release,  the best part of my chosen vocation, I lectured and pontificated, teaching American and English Literature, in a large lecture hall,  chain-smoking unfiltered cigarettes, during class instructions, throughout, to self medicate.
I am presently retired, thirty-five years in teaching, and have a modest lovely home and property, and as for wanderlust, I  have long found that armchair travel is the cheapest kind of travel, content to read brochures, than take inoculations, to explore the world.
Money aversion- ennui got worse as I grew older.
 I soon preferred the sidelines of copious earnings, a spent man, seeking  to relax and to write.
Why was I, so different, to care little for “success”, measured in hard work towards riches?
I wasn’t remotely money excited,  as a child, dimly knowing on a subliminal level that God didn’t place us here, on Earth,  on a special mission,  to make money.
A spiritual message experience, I received, as a teenager, a homeless runaway at seventeen, running from a divorced household of violence and police- being -called -by- the -neighbors,
became a core influence for my slant on monied life, a purposeful one of just getting by, instead of working hard towards earning luxuries.
It was Christmas time in New York City and I was seventeen years old, homeless penniless,  and wandering.
I had exited  the Museum of Natural History on Central Park West, where I had feasted for hours, on museum eye -candy, but my stomach  had rumbled with hunger.
And now back on the street, I found that it had been and was now, snowing heavily.
I wondered worriedly where I would sleep, that night.
 A local movie manager,  a friend, Paul Gary, said that I could, when in Brooklyn, sleep in a little used old loft room in his movie theatre, the Loews Oriental, in Bath Beach, Brooklyn, in a dusty, haunted costume property room.
I was the inhabiting spirit.
The smell of freshly roasted chestnuts,  sold to passerbys from a kiosk wagon, near to the museum’s stone steps, in a blizzard of snow, wafted my way and roused me.
I had no money in my pockets; I salivated at the  sweet nutty perfume.
 Chestnuts were a seasonal treat I had  enjoyed, at this very museum’s site, when I had a bountiful existence within my cantankerous parents’ marriage’s deep pockets’ circle of influence.
I would ask my parents,  they’d  fish for loose change and I would relish the sweet flavor of fire roasted hot chestnuts, now a new symbol of want and the faded memory of childhood .
I was alone upon the streets of Manhattan, hungry and had no money.
The  snow covered shoulders and face of the man who stood behind the kiosk wagon, were wrapped in steam; he was small and dark, wearing mittens with holes for the fingers.
The snow fell heavily in sheets that made a city of asphalt shock look gentler.
I  came close enough to  inhale the dark aroma of roasted chestnuts,  a childhood memory token, an olfactory solace for my pangs of hunger.
 I  noticed that on one side of his kiosk wagon hung a large piece of grey cardboard with a blue magic marker message upon it, his philosophy of the moment, but on an unconscious level, one  for the rest of my adult life.
A raised consciousness was sparked.
It read:
“I really don’t like making money;
I don’t want to conquer the world,
and I don’t wish to ever be rich;
I don’t even want to set the world, on fire;
 I just want to keep my nuts warm.”
A spiritual message, in a time of need, illuminated a larger life path.

ALIEN-ABDUCTION MIND-CONTROL


Alien Mind Scan

ALIEN MIND CONTROL DURING ABDUCTIONS

By Paul Schroeder

(Copyright 2014, Paul Schroeder – All Rights Reserved)
<Edited by Robert D. Morniingstar>
*******
Picture
Author’s note:
I am “he”
And this recollection is genuine.
However, I chose the pronoun, “he”, to make this vividly recalled abduction, more easily acceptable to the uninitiated reader.
With mind-control in place, and all questions vectored off before they can be spoken aloud, communication from alien-to-person prevails, with no equanimity possible  towards “conversation”..
ABDUCTION RECOLLECTION:
He is flying high over a lush green tree landscape, over rolling tree lined hills and though he knows that it must be night, within the tractor light-beam, under a moving craft,  the fields and countryside below are lit up as though it were day, but he knows it’s night, because he is told that he is dreaming.

 He is flying, floating above a tree landscape.
For a few brief seconds, until he is drawn into the craft, he sees the green granular nature of the trees below, and feels the  visual exhilaration of flying, but rather than fear, he is filled with a combined sense of peace and joyous happiness.

He marvels at the texture and color of his neighborhood, and his movement above it.

Going Over A Waterfall GIF - Waterfall Nature Forest GIFs

He is dreaming, but he is awake.The smaller craft lands near a much larger ship, hiding in plain sight, in a field.

A long ramp extends from and to the ship.

 

He is told by a small, dark, grey alien, always just out of sight, that he is to wait on line, for a tour of a country estate.

People stand on the ramp and slowly move forward

https://33.media.tumblr.com/6840e36a49f42a9997d0a04d5ba12deb/tumblr_nr7zaaz6y91sypuuko1_400.gif

He is numb and is  surreal vividly dreaming,  but he feels that he is awake.He  moves forward, people in front of him and in back of him,   on a narrow path surrounded by a false screen memory of a flat, unidimensional static scene,  a photograph of an English garden.

It is hot and humid with the rank smell of soil.

https://78.media.tumblr.com/9e3323c9a5424d20415b1f92bb3d679a/tumblr_n4b53629g21txbxgxo1_500.gif

People clutch what looks like brochures and move slowly in a single line, towards the country estate, bored, and only mildly interested.

He approaches the door of the large alien craft.

A ticket taker sits at the entrance way, on a stool behind a lectern, observing the entering crowd, a doorway official seen as a slim teenager.

He thinks it odd, that such a young caretaker should seemingly be in charge, and as he lifts his eyes to meet the teen’s gaze,  the young boy turns into a kindly old man.

“It’s mind control, not shape-shifting”, he is told, by a sonorous tour-guide’s voice, in answer to his unasked thought.

Image result for tumblr gifs of shape shifting aliens

Everyone is awake and dreaming.

Inside is a waiting room, dirty, dull and round, a white room with no adornments and a black floor.


He awakens, dreaming and feels that the room is in flight.

It is a dream within a dream.

Going Over A Waterfall GIF - Waterfall Nature Forest GIFs

Awake again, briefly, he is dreaming while standing upright, walking in his sleep, climbing  a steep metal stairway ladder path-bridge, that leads to a very large room at the top of the stairs.

Someone in front of him dreams, and wakes up dreaming.

He looks to his right, as he climbs, to see  an enormous domed -curved window which makes up the staircase’s whole upper wall of the alien craft, and as he climbs, feeling very numb, he pauses, and stops the line of mass abducted people.

He looks out of the window and sees the Earth and the Moon, opposite each other, hanging in the blackness of space.   He places his arms on the curved railing where the staircase meets the bottom of the window and cups his chin in his hands, to understand the raw beauty of what he sees:

Outside is blackness…

 

The Earth, in the far right portion of the glass window, hangs suspended in a black nothingness, a planet swimming in blue-white haze, with a large red area, perhaps, the desert of North Africa, or the Arabian peninsula.
A Time-Lapse of Earth taken by Elektro-L, The Russian Weather Satellite that Operates in Geostationary Orbit. (io9)Silver and bright, the Moon, far to the left portion of the glass, also hangs suspended in a black nothingness..

Far away, violet splashes of nebulae, and points of red pinpoint starlight, intersperse with millions of white stars.

Chin in his hands, he leans over and says in a wistful, admiring tone,

“These people who live at THIS estate have some view; what a view!”

The small, dark, grey alien tour guide became startled and all at once,  the window’s 3-D space scene, becomes  a painted uni-dimensional flat portrait,  of an English garden landscape.Chin in hands, still looking out of the window, but now at the expanse of poster-like green lawn, of a garden landscape, he dully repeats,

“They DO have a nice view!”

The tour guide, startled to hear him repeat this praise, seemingly unaware that the scene of the garden had already worked to distract him,  knee-jerk- reflex -overreacted; he is slammed with a mind control jolt.

lsd aliens GIF

The alien creature tightens and magnifies its short psychic leash of control to throw him into a vivid emotional ecstasy, and he feels compelled to look down at his feet, and away from the window’s view.

 

The simple metallic ladder- path underfoot, transforms into carved inlaid wood one, delicately patterned and dazzlingly ornate, an inlaid ebony and maple wood design, cryptic and deeply beautiful in motif and complexity.
He is forced to kneel to examine it, his eyes now fully away from the stars, Earth and moon, seen outside the enormous, curved window .
Powerful awe, love, and wood -admiration, a godlike reverence of wood, flashes through his mind at the mirage of the intricate wood designed staircase, suspended in air.
Opulent stenciled ornament on grand staircase in a elegant Victorian-Era townhouse in Pittsburgh.
Complex, gorgeous and lushly constructed, a staircase in multicolored woods,  forces an almost religious awe, which courses through his brain,  to thrill him, a tsunami of reverent awe for the dazzling wood patterns, and for the unknown artist-architect, overwhelms and distracts him, a gifted attempt to get him to forget what he has seen outside of the craft’s window.
The sleeping line of climbing people is now fully stopped by his fawning and repeated examinations, of the simple metal staircase, as he repeatedly retraces his steps to examine it, in a rapture.
.https://i1.wp.com/www.veteranstoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/alien-midway.jpg

The tour guide, just out of sight, presumes that the delusion is strong enough to have worked and he hears a resonant, deep, paternal, impatient voice, now within his head, “Just keep going; it will be there, for you to see, when you get back.”

“But, things change so quickly, in dreams”,  he thinks, “and this gorgeous wood stairway, will likely not be there, when I return.”

He lingers, enthralled.

Opulent stenciled ornament on grand staircase in a elegant Victorian-Era townhouse in Pittsburgh.
The alien ‘ guide’,  who tethers him and all the others, within a snug cocoon of illusions, had deftly made a simple, metal staircase, the un-rightful recipient of that stolen awe, of the magnificent scene viewed outside the craft’s window.
But when he awakens, he DOES remember the staircase and  his monumental awe of the spectacular space scene, outside the curved window, of the alien craft;
“Astounding creatures, uncanny, psychic, mind-bending, short- leash-controls…”
He  dully thinks, when he awakens exhausted, with a dull headache and a copious nose bleed, more tired getting up, than he had been, going to bed.
 And ‘dreams’, in a gnawing realization, could no longer ever again, be trusted  to merely be, .. ‘dreams’…
BIO:
Abductions and their remnant elusive memories have opened all this for me, a confirmed atheist, UNTIL I saw aliens float me out of my body, in my bed, at night.
Then, I knew that they were more interested in an essence, that I never suspected I had:: a Soul.
http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/alienfilm/images/6/65/Alien-real.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20130620214917
*******
Postscript
Rather than a fear-based approach to Dark Force Entity safety and caution, I prescribe a required spiritual “shift”  towards the equally unseen goodness of the spirit world, and away from fear.
Unlearning fear is a step-by-step acceptance and assertion, of one’s spiritual ‘Self’, a distance far and away from fearful  defenses mustered by one’s material physical self.
One’s longitudinal approach to any self-defense must be a spiritual one, and not a physical one.
For defenses to flare, one must  recognize that one is not a person having troubled spiritual problems, but instead an eternal soul having troubling human experiences.
From the stance of self-recognition as an eternal spirit, one can then insist on “one’s own space’ as spiritual fruition.

Avoid  church-based or organized religions and put the Bible on the same shelf as “The Tooth Fairy,” forGod is real, but He’s to be found down a long hall, and somewhere else.

ALIEN ABDUCTEES AND REINCARNATION

REINCARNATION AND ALIEN ABDUCTEES

 

Many tens of thousands of alien abductees the world over awaken in bed exhausted, to experience copious nosebleeds, yellow stains on their pillows, scars and scoop marks on their skin, subcutaneous implants and fearful, vivid recall of large eyed bug- like nonhuman entities, eyeball to eyeball, who are nighttime bedroom intruders and who pilot UFOs.
What could be worse?

Well, some lone, isolated people simply do not return after alien abductions.

 

Small ‘work-horse’ greys ( ‘synthetic-job-beings’) bathe in solutions of human cellular sludge, to imbibe nutrition ; whoever told us that we humans were at the top of the food-chain, was more than just disingenuous…

aliens abduction GIF
If the alternate truth weren’t so very scary, one might say that there are NO things worse, than being murdered, by the hands of elusive, malicious reptilian-grey alien creatures.
What is worse than death at their hands,

THE DEVIL’S WORK


 is birth, again, at the hands of these creatures.

A very different endgame is unnaturally inherent after an alien abductee’s death

alien abduction aliens GIF
People, after physical death, go on to that other dimension that we all come from and go to, a dimension that we call, ” Heaven ” and
as spirits, we see Earth as a ‘school’ where we briefly reside, repeatedly, in a succession of many lifetimes in a physical body, to learn ” lessons ” that refine and hone our spirits.

But, as if lifetime abductions by aliens weren’t enough, imagine many series of lifetimes, husbanded by  reptilian-greys, which interfered with our soul’s transit.

They , not unlike demons, collect and garner souls and then later transfer the raw energy into soulless bodies that they’ve created, bypassing  God and our – natural recycling, within the planning of HEAVEN, _EARTH, _HEAVEN, _EARTH for our soul’s designed evolution.

Then, there is no intermediary Heaven for such souls, no reunion of kindred spirits, no blueprint of lessons drawn up by the soul, itself and approved by the Council of Elders, all under God’s aegis.

 

Imagine one’s struggle to awaken spiritually again, in another body with imposed amnesia again, but this time after time, no Heaven between lifetimes.

 

When greys say; “WE HAVE THE RIGHT”, in a response to abduction related complaints, it’s because they’ve invested so very much time in us; that’s exactly why they know so much about our previous lifetimes.
Creepy critters, mean-spirited and with a cop’s scum-bag sense of entitlement, prevail..
They are more interested in our spiritual essences ,than we are even aware of our spiritual essences.
They can and do implant their own electromagnetic alien energies within humans, as ‘puppeteers, merge their soul energy with ours.
 ‘Where do you COME from?” asked by many abductees is blithely answered with, ‘We come from within”, with spiritual “walk-ins”,

 alien-reptilian energies implanted in aural energies and along  spinal columns, and this they refer to, as using humans as mere “containers.”

 

An arrogant proprietary timbre, that we ‘belong’ to them, that we are someone else’s very valuable property, prevails.
Ancient astronaut theories advance the revealing idea that all Old Testament “encounters” with a ‘vengeful divinity were sinister, masquerading reptilian aliens, authors of our physical beings, in craft above (“Heavens”)long held to see mankind as we view veal, and thus the kosher laws, were designed precisely as we feed Omaha cattle grain, for the ‘marbling’.

The Ark was an advanced technological weapon-communication contrivance, that the real G-d would never have needed or designed..

The true all-loving God is imbued within us and everything around us to be too easily discerned, and down a long hall and somewhere else other than the demanding, vengeful entity that helmeted the world’s idea of God, and whose craft violate our skies and whose technology even after 5,000 years, is still seemingly magical.

From Abraham, to Ezekiel, to Moses, these beings pretended to be G-d and they were and we still are, the Children of Israel, because children believe without question, what they’re told..

Just how is this demonic possessive-like alien magic accomplished?

 

In this case, I awaken to find myself placed, bolted and strapped into a large heavy padded metal chair in a round dimly lit room about 20 ft wide.
The small round room contains four such chairs in a circle with large van de Graaff Generator looking poles with round heads, about ten feet high and two feet thick, all standing tall between the chairs.

I can see across the room.

 

A huge hulking form of a man wearing a dark suit, sits opposite dead or me looking switched off. He hunches into another heavily padded metal chair and faces me.

 

Spectacular displays of what looks like white firework sparkler-like sparks fly straight up from these poles, high into the air ;Image result for tumblr gifs of alien technology
These sparks are quickly circled, cycled into a growing faster larger circle of white sparks above both of our heads, anticlockwise into  growing circle of more solid dazzling lights.
Parts of our soul energies are merged.
Then the sparkling circle of rotating lights is siphoned off into another hulking machine just beyond my sight.
Our energies have been stolen; parts of our souls have been stored for creating another soul into an alien created body form.
And worse, implanted alien energies, immature reptilians, feast from our energies.

A ghost, after all, is an electromagnetic fog of memory and personality.

ghost GIF
This spiritual theft alien agenda gives new meaning to the concept of “a silent invasion”.
When humans see UFO craft in the skies above our cities they dully forget to evaluate the true purposes of the pilots within but focus instead on the craft itself as though some devious alien mind control were at play.
They could squash us like bugs but prefer to be elusive such that we are in a proverbial hall of mirrors with a quicksand floor when it comes to any clearer understanding of their motives for incessant abductions.

What we do know is that we are mere sheep for shearing, to them; we are used by them in the same way that remora and lamprey use prey, as parasitic denizens of the oceans.

It is the Devil’s work.

 

Afterward:

 

Director of CIA, Admiral R.H. Hillenkoetter: “It is time for the truth to be brought out in open Congressional hearings. Behind the scenes, high-ranking Air Force officers are soberly concerned about UFOs. But through official secrecy and ridicule, citizens are led to believe the unknown flying objects are nonsense.
To hide the facts, the Air Force has silenced its personnel.”
p. 58, quoted from New York Times, February 28, 1960, p. L30

​BIO:

Abductions and their remnant elusive memories have opened all this for Paul, a confirmed atheist, UNTIL Paul saw aliens float him out of his body, in his bed, at night.
Then, he knew that they were interested in an essence that he never suspected that he had, a nonphysical soul.
Our spiritual powers that interest and addict inter-dimensionals are the very powers that can be used to thwart further attacks.
They infect auras with attachments to themselves and ride the reincarnation roller coaster with human beings, as a sanctuary, to avoid the death that they fear and to steal the spiritual recycling that we have.
Souls are garnered, detoured from our natural spiritual evolution in Heaven.
These joyriding grays can be sinister, dis-corporate alien souls, stuck to our energies, which bring a new meaning to the concept of a silent invasion.

BAD LUCK ISN’T BAD KARMA

“IF I DIDN’T HAVE BAD LUCK, I WOULDN’T HAVE NO LUCK AT ALL”

By Paul Schroeder

 

(Author’s note:  the title is  from a Rodney Dangerfield routine..)

*******
You have certainly heard it said, that in our lives’ destinies, “All IS WRITTEN”? 

According to  reputable and gifted psychics, our lives are carefully planned by our spirits, beforehand, that we assemble spirit helpers and spirit guides, in Heaven,  to accompany us, long  before we jump into another womb’s prenatal body,  for yet another lifetime.

Life,  they assure us, is a series of pre-programmed events staged with proscribed boons and travails, specifically designed to grow us spiritually closer towards God, a God who gives us myriad  incarnations, to hone and perfect us.

Earth is our ‘school’.

Even a ‘deja vu’, a moment haunting in its odd feeling, that we’ve ‘ been ‘there’, before’,   psychics say, is precisely such a specially pre-inserted moment, in our blueprint,  a small  odd- feeling- ‘bump’, in time, designed to remind us, unconsciously, that we are assessed perfectly aligned, with our  pre-planned spiritual lessons, in that moment.

How, then, is one to understand spates of bad luck, that stubbornly seem to follow one throughout?

For some of us, and that includes me, day after day, week after week, awful little and large things happen in  doses that nag at us, and seem to resist  greater meaning.

The title’s male comedian, once complained:

“I have the worst luck all of the time; I have no luck at all.

If it wasn’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have no luck at all!”:
I miss buses and oversleep appointments lose my wallet and keys, stub my toes,  step in dog poo and bang my head underneath cabinets.

“Just yesterday, I woke up, got dressed, and a button fell off; I  reached for a closet door and the knob came off!

I grabbed my suitcase, and the handle came off;…

I was afraid,… to go to the bathroom!…”

 

If  it’s true, that “all is written”, how does one explain annoying and troubling
‘nothing is going right’ periods, that persist?

Many gifted psychics, privately affirm that since  ,’all IS written’, awful bad luck events happen, by no  accidents; aligned with spirit, bad luck, in a continuous line, is commonly backstage- orchestrated.


Large and small bad luck occurrences will happen everywhere, all at once, in one’s life, as a spiritual “sign”, an alert that one is sadly far from one’s prearranged spiritual path.

When one has strayed too far away from one’s Heavenly, towards God,  pre-planned ‘blueprint’, self delineated in intricate fashion,  bad luck will stubbornly continue to manifest.

Then, It’s no coincidence that you lost your wallet, spilled the coffee on the computer keyboard, stepped on the cat, had a bathroom pipe leak down onto the kitchen ceiling, got a flat tire and missed the train and that was only Tuesday!

“Nothing is going right!”, life malfunctions, reveal that something else LARGER at stake, down a long hallway, and somewhere else behind our ‘curtains’, is ALSO not right.


Bad luck in series, is the tyrannical effort of Heaven, specifically,
our spirit guides and spirit helpers, who are more than  just trying to get our attention.

I can actually, at this point hear the known cynics and pernicious doubters yet again exclaim,”Your thesis, to me, personally, is just nonsense!”

What about those people who have one good luck event, after another good luck event follow them?

When one is on one’s correct preplanned blueprint’s spiritual path, ‘everything just seems to go right’?

Yes.

If we are progressing correctly, according to “plan”, then all of the little confluences and connections in our life begin to seem to work, and series of fortuitous coincidences occur like perfect magic:

We catch the bus, right on time, we meet that person we were hoping to see, we gain hope and guidance automatically, from kind strangers,  we find that misplaced thing we searched for, garner the needed finances that we sought ;

wonderful coincidences gather like flies at our mustaches.

Only when one is much too far from one’s self-set goals, does all Hell seem to break loose, everywhere and all at once, repeatedly.



Chronic and persistent ‘bad luck’ isn’t the ‘disease’ itself, but is instead an emergent ‘symptom’, of a disease.

But, can it be all that simple?

After learning this, minor constant misfortunes that never seem to end, rather than blindly depress you, will enlighten and cheer you, because it confirms that our path, is indeed a pre-planned path, and that, “Yes, Virginia, there really IS a Santa Claus,”

on ‘stage’, and ‘behind our curtains’.

Consistent negative synchronicities, are messages and bad luck events, now alert us that we are NOT up on our spiritual ‘toes’.

Ask oneself:

Am I being helpful to others or self-consumed and impish?

Am I forgiving, or nurturing grudges?

Am I consoling someone who needs consoling or am I, not wanting to ‘engage’,  avoiding them?

Am I offering charity to someone in need, or cautiously sidestepping involvement?

Am I being supportive or judgmental?

Am I being loving or impatient?

The cessation of bad luck troubles, relies and depends on one’s spiritual shift- of -perspective, a recognition that will appeal to your spirit helpers and spirit guides.

Be calm.

Listen to something emotionally releasing, like taped wholesome standup comedy; laughing can reset brain chemical imbalances from angst and is a wholesome therapy, instrumental in stopping deepening fugue, about persistent bad luck events..

Large doses of laughter can jump start and stir the cheer of one’s lagging soul .


Essentially, one must recognize those backstage  spiritual influences; a prayer for guidance and enlightenment is now tantamount.

Pray, IN THANKS to your spirit helpers and angels, who do a mostly thankless job, most often, and then, ask them for spiritual assistance.

Prayer, to be put back on the ‘right path’  will suffice, and  then all at once, as though in answer, the confluent series of ‘ bad luck’ events will suddenly abate.

Then, be sure to react with love to the situations that next present themselves, to you.

“Why me?!” is always the wrong question.

“Why NOW?” is more apt.

Bad luck in a series of repeated events means that
we have missed the inner signposts of mercy and patience and forgiveness and are indeed far from our set spiritual goals at that moment in time.

Series of bad luck incidents in our lives are NO accidents .

“All is written” may sound facile and glib, but one’s spirit helpers can and will reach from behind the curtains of Heaven and appear almost tyrannical, as they attempt to fast turn one into another direction, like adjusting a human skillet frying pan by grabbing one roughly, by the handle…..

For we are not humans having spiritual experiences, but spirits, having human experiences.

Prayer, with feelings only of gratitude, strongly helps to bring a message for the cessation of travails, until one’s head is re-screwed on, properly, to extend love, in all endeavors, to others..

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm

*******

AN INTERVIEW WITH PAUL SCHROEDER

Paul Schroeder's picture

(Copyright 2010, Paul Schroeder – All Rights Reserved)

(Edited by Robert D. Morningstar)

AN INTERVIEW WITH PAUL SCHROEDER

 

(Author’s note: Rather than a fear-based approach to Dark Force Entity safety and caution, this judgement prescribes a required spiritual “shift”  towards the equally unseen goodness of the spirit world, and away from fear; unlearning fear, is a step by step acceptance, and assertion, of one’s spiritual ‘self’, a distance far and away from fearful  defenses mustered by one’s physical self. Prayer, is fear, gone brave..)
P.S.

I was very recently interviewed by Hayden Topperwien, an Australian filmmaker, who asked me to act as technical/consulting adviser in background research for his upcoming film about “Psychiatry vs. Possession.“

 

                Below are some of his questions:

 

Q: In your view, what is the most misrepresented aspect of this field in cinema/literature? Are there any aspects that you feel would be dangerous for public consumption?

 

A: The aspect of danger lies in this: Ouija boards are still commercially sold as novelty items and remain unrecognized by the general public (viewing Ouija as “a board game,” like Monopoly or Scrabble) as objects that offer solid invitations (invocations) to dark force entities to approach directly.

 

Television shows with conjuring themes, i.e. Witch Season, Witch Hunter, Charmed, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Ghost Whisperer, Bewitched, The Librarians, compound the danger as they uniformly suggest to the viewing public that there is no real danger in witchcraft, wizardry and “ghost hunting.”

 

But there is great spiritual and psychological dangers awaiting he unwitting in all of them.

 

These shows project a fake facade of entertainment and impart a false sense of safety.

The truth is down a long hall and somewhere else.

 

                                          

                                                             The Reality:

 

If you pay attention to the paranormal, it does indeed pay attention to you.

A “ghost box’, however fascinating as a doorway to the unseen is a dangerous opportunity for a masquerading  evil one to enter to feast on your energies.

 

I would say that if you had a loaded gun with a hair-trigger and an often used ghost box, that the gun offers less potential jeopardy for permanent damage to you and yours.

The truth about Dark Force entities is that even when one dabbles in the occult it can fully open to one, and demons drift in to feel that tacit unspoken permission. That occurs and then they feel that they own you.

 

One’s life and mind suddenly and forever become a nightmarish battleground.

These television shows wrongly create a sense of harmless fascination with the Dark Side and a false sense of honest experimentation with the Occult Dark Side because such open doors invite predatory, negative, bullying entities inside.

 

Which “Ghost Buster” can one successfully find in the Yellow Pages, at that point?

One can open doors that are not easily closed again.
The same inherent danger holds true for UFO sky watch group enthusiasts.
A fuller understanding of the nature of the occupants of those craft would quickly cure you of sky watching.

They treat us in the same perfunctory way that we treat chickens.

They can read your consciousness from great distances, hone in on it and follow you home…

 

My experiences of high strangeness became dramatic and even odder after I had a sighting of a flotilla of nine craft that appeared overhead.
The great danger of an innocuous sky watch organized to simply watch UFOs is that the occupants can climb down the psychic ladder of your awe.

Later, you remain unaware that you’ve been “Chosen” to become a specimen, to be (parasitically) examined, researched, meddled with, and micro managed under the guise of seemingly otherworldly ‘research’.

 

Just like the danger inherent in using a Ouija board in a badly infested house, a sky watch is imprudent;to assemble anywhere seeking aliens could easily change your life for the worse.

 

These UFO greys and reptilians are astounding in their unparalleled telepathic-mind -control,( mental image projection and impositions of delusional scenarios,) of all humans, used as a short psychic-leash, beings uncannily canny in reading our minds, and vectoring away our minds.

 

The subtle life-script changes and negative influences that meddling greys, demons and other negative thought entities impose into our lives, go unnoticed by most people, but they are nonetheless there, sinister, menacing,   seeking  parasitism of human consciousness, itself.

 

There are many abductee reported perverse and untoward sexually explicit incidents, where small dark greys( quite sinister) actively participate in orchestrated sexual acts aboard craft, with human kidnapped victims..

I have read other reports (by young women abductees) which recorded their intense rapture in sexual one-night-stand- trysts with presumed young, sexy men, who walked passed mirrors, in women’s bedrooms, to instead reveal images of masquerading small grays, an unrealized sexual entity, one whose telepathic prowess is also heart-bending, as well as mind-bending..

Why expose oneself to that risk under the guise of seeking excitement and fun?

 

I remind people who are UFO night watch enthusiasts that such curiosity is as dangerous as an eager, unguided person playing with a Ouija board in a badly haunted house.

 

Everyone should be alerted and forewarned that inter-dimensional doors will open that you may not be able to close again and that “what follows you home” afterwards might be more than you were ever prepared to deal with.

 

If you were told that running naked in the woods would likely get you poison ivy, wouldn’t you want to know to amend your impulse to do so?

 

After abductions one would not look up again at a clear starry night sky in joy, but with dread.

 

Q: What do you think would be the most positive outcome of an exploration of this field through film?

 

A: Darkness cannot thrive and persist where there is much light; to open and forewarn closed or naive minds to the notion that dis-corporate intelligence can influence them and cause disease and mental illness is to surely fore arm such unsuspecting minds.

 

God sends some of us into darkest corners to illuminate them for others.

Your film should perhaps raise more questions in the audience’s mind than it should supply answers.

 

Q: Can you describe what takes place in very simple terms, in an event of demonic possession?

 

If there were any physical manifestations of such an event, what form would they take?

 

A: One’s thoughts are suddenly not one’s own; facial ticks and muscle and appendage twitches occur as the inhabiting entity tries to assert muscular control to operate the body.

 

An enabling and warming sense of rage simmers under your surface; lust and sexuality blossom strongly as do cravings for alcohol, drugs, meats, sweets/candy as the negative entity asserts itself under your reactions.

 

You can feel disconcerted at the internal difference; you feel evilly sated rather than saddened when listening to news stories about lives lost or human suffering.

 

Very vivid and unsettling nightmares prevail; long lost experiences and long forgotten faces in your life manifest in worst scenario vignettes as the indwelling entity assumes access to all of your memories and your chakras energy points.

Almost all mean-spirited, spiritually-virulent, negative people have reptilian or demonic attachments, without ever gaining a self- glimmer of a hint of this truth.
They wrongly have assumed, quite naturally, all of their lives, that the horrid whispers within, are from themselves, and not ego-alien.

 

It is a long, almost impossible battle to realize that the “enemy” is from ‘outside’ of one’s consciousness.

Only then, can a winning fight be fought for self-actualization.

Q: In what way does a normal nightmare differ from one which represents a psychic attack?

A: All nightmares are varying degrees of imposed psychic attacks as you are being negatively ‘milked’ ethereally for energy within raw angst, by an entity who you might have picked up in daily transit not unlike dog poo on your shoe bottoms.

Nightmare imposed vivid images cement connections from the demonic to the human host’s energy fields, connections that beyond understanding, give ‘sanctuary’ scenarios for dark ones to inhabit.

The signature function of the brain during dreaming is to maintain the dream state, to incorporate extraneous outside stimuli into a dream, to ‘lie to you’, to keep you dreaming.

If a fire truck’s siren blares down your block while you are sleeping your brain will incorporate that sound into the dream scenario at hand to keep you asleep and dreaming.

The ‘convenience dream’ clearly illustrates how this works.

One’s bladder may dully pulse as full, but rather than awaken the sleeper, the brain conjures a bathroom scenario instead where one ‘dreams’ that one saw the tile floor and even sat down on a toilet.

One awakens much later thinking, with a fuller bladder, thinking; ‘I thought that I just WENT to the bathroom?!’

A nightmare, which awakens one, usually in greeat angst, violates this tacit basic rule of dreaming by awakening one.

One’s rude awakening instead reveals that nightmare scenarios are being telepathically imposed by a parasitic, discorporate entity for its ethereal feasting.

. A nightmare is very rarely a self-created scenario. In possession, the entity is no longer in daily transit to torture another (phantoms fill the air around us), but has settled in and has chosen you, as a ‘host’.

The nightmares and bad dreams under a state of demonic possession seem realistic in every way compared to the intensity of waking consciousness and appear to be out of body attacks. One feels at every nighttime that one flirts with the beast of madness, itself.

Concurrent with such psychic attacks is poltergeist phenomena; things move within immediate vision, knocks and tapping on the walls and a general heavy unhappy creepy atmosphere envelope the house and its occupants.

Pranks predominate.

Objects disappear to return days later in strange places and there’s always a powerful sense of being watched by large eyes.

Q: What kind of person is most vulnerable to this kind of attack? How do they become a target?

A: One who leaves one’s front door open to the street will invite in unwanted miscreants, unknown horrid people who wander in seeking mischief and unwholesomeness; so, too, does one who uses a Ouija board or thinks that it might be fun to have a ghost around easily and unknowingly invites the opportunistic gangster fringe element of the spirit world in.

The attack is telepathic in nature.

One who does not question the source of every negative thought one has, but who ignorantly and wrongly assumes that bizarre, odd and horrid negative thoughts, urges and behaviors are simply one’s own, is especially susceptible.

Wolves like demons choose the weakest of the flock; young children are special nighttime targets who crawl into bed with their parents to seek protection from their energies, but there is an inverse rule also: people of strong spiritual light also bring these parasitic entities in like porch lights do bring in moths and then draw bats.

The dark side seeks to extinguish light and they attempt to do this by destroying the light in the person.

Thus they will be attracted to people who shine brightly with such light.

A priest, a psychic or psychic healer, or a highly moral public figure in power are much more attractive to destroy than a mere banal person as “the trophy” is more valued.

Q: What is the worst possible outcome of such an event?

A: Murder and or sexual abuse of one’s own children, suicide, mental illness, drug addictions and self destructive habits, jail incarcerations may result.

Q: What kind of mistakes does Western psychology make when dealing with this issue?

A: Western science does not differentiate between spiritual possession and clinical mental illness; a child who hears discorporate voices and sees spirits/ghosts is deemed psychotic not psychic, and thus is wrongly medicated.

Many institutionalized back ward ‘psychotic’ patients are possessed not insane.

Q: What is your view of the origin/nature of these non-physical entities?

A: They are inter-dimensional entities, denizens of several parallel spirit worlds. Most people with unwanted energy attachments will have more than one of the following:

Fatigue
Headaches
Cold patches in the aura
Insomnia
Bad dreams and nightmares
Unexplained aches and pains
Anxiety and fearfulness
Depression
Obsessive/compulsive behavior
Self mutilation
Eating Disorders
Out of character behavior, especially angry outbursts
Lack of eye contact or a ‘haunted’ look in the eyes
Drug addiction or alcoholism
Suicidal thoughts or actual attempts

Q: Do you think the existence of these phenomena will ever be explored by science, or that it is essentially unreachable by the physical sciences?

A: Science is especially inept in its ability to calibrate the human soul or gauge a demonic possession; it is beyond their measuring capabilities and thus does not exist. ​

To quote an abductee contemporary;

“A factor that God wants us to realize more completely and fully is that we are not alone in this ocean of air.

Even as vicious sharks and barracuda prowl the water, their demonic counterparts, foul and unclean spiritual raptors and carrion-eaters, demons who attack people, inhabit the ocean of air right along with us.

It is essential to our spiritual well-being to understand Paul’s warning in Ephesians 6:10-12 that our battles are against these creatures, and that demons are fighting tooth-and-toe nail to hang on to what they believe is theirs by first-occupancy rights. ”

Q – Do you believe there is any power in archaic protection/exorcism rituals?

How do different traditions differ in their approach?

Which is, in your opinion, the best?

A: Exorcism is similar to extracting a nail from one’s tire and tossing it back into traffic where it will be picked up by someone else.

Q – In terms of public education and safety, what do you feel are the most important points to get across regarding this issue?

A: For those dubious or cynical about the’ realities’ discussed, herein, I remind you that it’s never too late to increase your learning, now that you’re aware at least that much knowledge exists outside of your accumulated realm of learning.

It’s sadly more than probable that there are many like you who are totally unaware of the unseen as well as the evil unseen, which makes you and them all the more vulnerable.

Knowledge is power and in this realm ignorance is hardly ever bliss.

The unseen evil world around us is as real as the nose on your face and as equally hard to see, but it exists nonetheless.

 

GRANDMA’S RUSSIAN ADVICE

Grandma’s Advice

by Paul Schroeder

Just before my grandmother on my mother’s side died at the age of 95, I whispered a kiss in her ear and thanked her for her wisdom.

One odd piece of advice, that she had taught me when I was a child, I had carried close to my inner ear, all of my life.

It had been an Independence Day warning, borne of a distant Russian wisdom, one that she had whispered to me four decades ago, when I was nine or ten years old, impressionable and the apple of her eye.

The imprecation that I got from her, the warning whispered in my small rapt ear when I was nine or ten years old had been an odd warning that ruled and guided my life, and through angst, had come to define a larger part of what I called my soul.

Her ‘Russian optimism’ for the world, was childhood overwhelming for me.
For her, life was always a cup of optimism, half filled ….. but, with something, that could  likely kill you.

Now, she at ninety-five was far from that woman who in giving advice could be ironic and poetical.

She had used lipstick as a rouge to color her cheeks and then decided that her whole face was of a pallor that also needed color, rubbed lipstick all over her face.

She was quite a shock when I got onto the seventh floor of the retirement home and turned the corner and saw her sitting in a wheelchair, as though apparently waiting for me.

 

She still had her sense of humor.

She earnestly asked with a childlike innocence if I could bring her some new makeup and some big diamond jewelry for her to wear to dress herself up, when I visited her next?

Cautiously, I had asked her, skeptically dubious ;”What type of diamond jewelry?” She had said;

“Expensive, fancy jewelry.”

She labored under the delusion that she was in a hotel in Miami, one that slouched in basic standards;

“The meals at this hotel are terrible, but what is a person to do?”

She did not ever surmise herself to be in a nursing home near the beach in Coney Island, Brooklyn.

A person’s senior mind can lend a type of psychic anesthesia that acts in many ways to protect it from uncompromising and painful truths. .

Now I was an odd adult.

I wanted her to know that I loved her, how her whisper had returned years later as my gratitude.

I had loved to cherish ideas; a rare few philosophers had touched my early soul .

Dr. Seuss had barely competed with grandma.

But, he  wrote : “Be who you are and say what you think, because those who matter don’t mind, and those who mind, don’t matter!”

 

But grandma didn’t recall her similar advice or the small pleasures and agonies of our past.

My other odd philosopher was sitting here in her wheelchair, armed and propped with a pillow/ alarm that would audibly alert nurses in the retirement home if she pitched forward and left her chair’s upright fixed position.

She was different the next time I saw her, the way she used to be ;

” Hello, Paul; sharp as a matzoh and twice as crummy!”

“How come you don’t call your grandma more often? Humph!!”

“Humph;You going to wait until I’m in the cemetery and THEN you’ll visit me?”

“I’m sorry, that you’ll be sorry, but THEN it’ll be too late!”

This was the same verbatim greeting that I had gotten from her over the years over the telephone .  I presumed that I was calloused to it all.

 

It always deeply riddled me with guilt but I never let her know, but instead I saw it rather as a good sign that she was still feeling feisty.

When she successfully aimed ring-toss-Velcro-guilt in my direction, I rationalized, she must be feeling much better.

I quickly tried to change the subject; ” Grandma I remember that boardwalk we can see here in Brighton Beach from a time when you were fifty years old and I was about nine years old and I still remember the good advice that you gave me, back then.”

“What advice did I give you?”

I told her.

It had stayed with me for many years as a token of her wisdom.

“You brought me to you on a bench on that boardwalk, in Coney Island, on a hot 4th of July afternoon, when the whole family was there suddenly hugging and kissing each other,

happy for once, to be all together and happy seeing the fireworks, and then you whispered it in my ear:

“Don’t get too close to people; you’ll catch their dreams,” You told me.

“What?”, she said, so I told her again;

“Don’t get too close to people; you’ll catch their dreams.”

 

“OH!”, she said,”I am VERY sorry, if I ever told you that!.”

“I AM very sorry.”

I reminded her, however, what an impact she’d had on me then.

“That whisper, as a recommended life philosophy, was both poetry and  true and that, your advice, really stayed deeply with me.”

 

Taken to heart, it had allowed me to remain aloof and separate from everyone, as a type of self protection,  to preserve my OWN dream.

 

“She looked at me as though I were some stranger in a dream.

I said it, again;

“Don’t get too close to people, you’ll catch their dreams.”

She was thoughtful and then looked worried.

 

She looked into my eyes.

“I never told you THAT.” …

 

“You shouldn’t get too close, because…”

“Germs”, she said.

” I said that you’ll catch their GERMS.”

“I told you and your sister MANY times;

“Don’t get too close to people, ’cause you’ll catch their GERMS.” she said, again.

 


“And YOU’RE supposed to be the smart one?!””Oh,” she groaned in pain.”
Take me over to the dining room; it’s still too early for the lunch, but I want to get there anyway, early.”

That wrong belief had overshadowed every relationship in my life with an ambivalence and a craving to just be left alone.

If one was alone, one was safe from what people could do to you, I had always reasoned.

But, I had been running away from my own shadow.

Two marriages and a dozen influenza later, I had realized her truth, too late.