COUNSELING ALIEN ABDUCTEES

COUNSELING ALIEN ABDUCTEES

By Paul Schroeder

Alien Abducted Correspondences
( A young woman in Dallas who reports vivid, odd dreams and UFO sightings for months, writes me, from Dallas, Texas)
Dear Paul,

Here’s something… This guy who lives across from me -Bruce- He’s a retired homicide detective from DPD- I’ve known him now for almost 5 years- I tell you this to demonstrate that he is an intelligent, rational person- not someone given to imaginings or flights of fancy.

 

His skin reacts badly to the sun, and having worked at night for so many years, that’s when he’s usually awake. so he goes out late in the evenings and after dark to sit  outside on a bench on the lawn-

He called me night before last to ask me if I would join him there that night- there was something he wanted to show me. Since we frequently go back and forth to each others apts. for lunch, dinner or having a drink or smoke together while watching a movie- I knew he wasn’t inviting me out there for what some may see as “obvious” reasons.

 

 

I hadn’t been out there with him before, because as I’ve stated before- I don’t particularly like going outside at night. Well anyway, he said that he had been noticing an interesting object in the sky off and on lately- last couple of months. At first he didn’t think anything about it, since we live only ten minutes from Dallas Intercontinental Airport- and see planes going back and forth day and night.

He began to notice a difference in this object, after a few times observing it in the night sky.

He said that he began to notice a pattern to it’s appearance- every couple of nights he would see it.

Also the erratic flight pattern it seemed to exhibit.
First of all, it was always way higher up than any of the planes flew- and consequently smaller in appearance- but emitting extremely bright oddly distributed light patterns.

 As he began to regularly watch it, he noticed that it moved in stops and starts and a wide zigzagging pattern of flight- something he’d never seen a regular plane do.

 Once, when looking through his binoculars, he noticed a long thin stream of some sort of emission coming from it as it swept around the sky.

About 45 minutes or so after that , he started to feel a slight dizziness and tingling in his limbs and face- then a headache coming on- so he went back inside.

Then he began to remember a couple of other times when this had occurred- he had felt fine- and would observe the UFO type object and later start to feel sick- nausea- headache so forth.

At first he didn’t connect it, when you get our age, you almost expect to have these afflictions come over you-from meds and all- you can usually find something to blame it on-

 

Having been in homicide investigation for over thirty years, Bruce is of a detail, clue oriented mind set- anything which seems strange or unusual, he’ll automatically try to figure out why. he knows that this type of thing is of interest to me- so he wanted to see what I thought about it.

Not having observed this object for a couple of nights, he assumed that true to schedule, it would show up that night.  Well- it did! I saw it and noticed the strange flight pattern he had mentioned- it did seem to be extremely high up in the sky too- but the lights on it were so strong that they were still easily discernible even from that height.-they seemed to be in a triangular pattern too- not distributed in the same design as the planes…

I suggested that it might be a good idea for us to go back inside before whatever it was dropping had time to reach us– I wasn’t anxious to experience the same symptoms he had experienced before.

We haven’t definitely decided that we’ve seen a real UFO, but who knows…maybe we did- I have a feeling others have seen it too and wondered…I’m sure that it is being tracked by the airport radar- but they won’t make anything

public….

[]
Statue of Repto Sapien god from ancient Sumer
On display in The British Museum

Jack says that they received hundreds of calls at the station from people all the time about strange things they saw in the skies….especially around the airport,they were usually brushed off as another plane or something…. but that this object, upon close observation didn’t resemble another airplane or weather balloon or anything like that, it probably is only noticeable at night, when the lights can be seen.

But his dreams and now mine have become so odd and strange.

 

So maybe not only I have seen a UFO, and it does seem to be always nearby
Sincerely yours,

Phyllis

 

Dear Phyllis,
After the airport closes, perhaps after 1:00 A. M., these things in the sky stand out more.
.

They’re  capable of looking like airplane or just fuselages( beyond belief they are crafty enough to attach motor ‘sounds’ broadcasts, to make it SOUND like an airplane) but their stop and start erratic changes in direction and their sheer high elevation  give them away within a minute or two of observation.

Nightmares may be screen memories to muddle recollection aboard craft or insertion of core images as trauma, to make connections to your mind.

Try to stay ‘lucid’ to interact with them in dream-scape.

The danger in studying these things, of looking up, is a jeopardy most profound; they can “feel” your psychic attention, focused, even from that distance.
 They can and do climb down the ladder of your awe and your broadcasted curiosity, down from those extreme heights, right into your laps.

alien GIF

 

That’s how highly psychic they and their technology make them; they’re out ‘fishing’ for awe energy from anyone studying the skies.
Psychic waves of intent which burn with curiosity, reach far out to them and are read.
We are galactic psychic pawns in a telepathic-chess- game against psychic knights and bishops…
Such people who ‘notice’  these objects also usually have buried dim memory stirrings of being on-board craft, forgotten by alien “suggestion”; he may well have implants within him.
It’s NEVER an ‘accident when one with awe and curiosity sees craft overhead.
It’s choreographed.
His nausea is evidence of that long distance psychic connection; nausea is a sign that they are communicating ( raw suggestion and very high EMF transmissions do cause such nausea) with his unconscious mind, below awareness. 

 Nausea is a reaction to any sinister psychic intrusion, any presence of evil, demonic intent, sensed by one’s soul-unconscious.

Nausea often prevails within  ‘sensitives’ who are paranormal  investigators when they are studying a badly haunted house and come across demonic beings.

Aliens, from that height, make “exchanges” to our unconscious, readily communicate with that part of our minds we are dimly aware of and cannot easily access.

As inter-dimensional creatures who travel in time and who manipulate time, itself,  their psychic prod to  satisfy their own proprietary, omnipresent need to meddle in our lives, and our consciousness.
These are the very same critters who take you when you’re in deep REM and ‘cloak’ all recall of abductions and surgical techniques with vivid scenic realistic-like “dreams”.
Those vivid strange dreams aren’t dreams at all, but are always ‘screen memories’ ; now you can see how successful and sneaky they are in what they do.
Most people marched around a craft will awaken none the wiser.

 

If one person hallucinates aliens, that’s his hallucination, but if millions, worldwide report the same abduction scenario, then, it is reality in every sense of the word’s meaning.
“Dreams”, vivid and troubling, reported by abductees, of alien encounters, are in fact physical and astral kidnapping.

Taken during R.E.M. sleep, by highly  psychic beings, wrapped in a dreamy cocoon of delusion, on a short psychic leash, few humans ever recall  being marched around an alien craft, and awaken in bed, in oblivion.

Time coincidences,  the psychic nudge to gaze at the clock, in a timely moment, according to cutting edge UFO research literature, is tied to alien creatures, who intimately and closely micromanage humans.
Sightings of alien craft, however, commonly occur with impunity.
Abductees rarely recall a thing, but when one does and troubled, seeks for my assistance, it’s rare  to encounter an abduction in progress.
Paul
Dear Paul,

I saw a UFO

FROM: Diane DATE: Tue, 24 Sep 2017 21:24:02 EDT

Hi.
I just wanted to tell you that I saw a UFO.

I was on line chatting when all of a sudden I had the urge to go outside and look up.

So I did, and there it was. It flew out of the sky.
It stopped and wobbled a bit.
Then it was turning around.
As it was turning around it flashed a bright red flash on its side.

Then a car came, and it left.
It just floated by.
It had 3 bright lights on it.
It was amazing.
It also had 2 tail lights.

Two nights later I had a dream that I was abducted.

 

Please write me back and tell me what you think.
Thanks,
Diane
AFTERWORD:

An overview word, about safety, to abductees who rage and strongly resist nighttime bedroom intruders and abductions:

“Loosh”, is an ergot expression for a quantum of raw energy that each of us is ‘milked’ for, by aliens, like ants do to aphids , and sexual energy is a feast for them, which they manipulate to endanger the human host to their depravity.

The cows who refuse to be ‘milked’ are not seen by ‘farmers’, anymore but instead the ‘butchers’ are sent in.

The best thing to do is to focus on living healthy and well, and use ONLY passive methods (garlic/sulfur/meditation/tea-tree oil sprayed onto one, to thwart their efforts.

When one pulls the tail of the rabid alien tiger, he does not run off, but instead turns to face you…

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UFO and ALIEN DISCLOSURE? : A FROG PARABLE

by Paul Schroeder

Scientists and researchers in SETI and NASA, for more than sixty years, have seemingly ignored tens of thousands of reports of alien encounters by abductees, the world over, and patently ignored the evidence of UFO photographs taken by aircraft gun cameras from many nations, even though

 

 NASA’s space astronauts have been quoted saying that they know for sure that we are being visited:

Major Gordon Cooper:

“I believe that these extra-terrestrial vehicles and their crews are visiting this planet from other planets..
. Most astronauts were reluctant to discuss UFOs.”
“I did have occasion in 1951 to have two days of observation of many flights of them, of different sizes, flying in fighter formation, generally from east to west over Europe.”

Donald Slayton:

“I was testing a P-51 fighter in Minneapolis when I spotted this object.

I was at about 10,000 feet on a nice, bright, sunny afternoon. I thought the object was a kite, then I realized that no kite is gonna fly that high.
” As I got closer it looked like a weather balloon, grey and about three feet in diameter.
But as soon as I got behind the darn thing it didn’t look like a balloon anymore.
It looked like a saucer, a disk.
About the same time, I realized that it was suddenly going away from me – and there I was, running at about 300 miles per hour.

I tracked it for a little way, and then all of a sudden the damn thing just took off. It pulled about a 45 degree climbing turn and accelerated and just flat disappeared.”

Robert White:

 

“I have no idea what it could be.
It was grayish in color and about thirty to forty feet away.”
Then according to a Time Magazine article, Major White exclaimed over the radio:
“There ARE things out there! There absolutely is!”
Joseph A. Walker:
He had filmed five or six UFOs during his record breaking fifty-mile-high flight in April, 1962.
It was the second time he had filmed UFOs in flight.
During a lecture at the Second National Conference on the Peaceful Uses of Space Research in Seattle, Washington he said: “I don’t feel like speculating about them.
All I know is what appeared on the film which was developed after the flight.”

Aliens Abduction GIF

Eugene Cernan:

 In a Los Angeles Times article in 1973 he said, about UFOs: “…I’ve been asked (about UFOs) and I’ve said publicly I thought they (UFOs) were somebody else, some other civilization

Neil Armstrong:

 

According to the NASA Astronaut Neil Armstrong, “the Aliens have a base on the Moon and told us in no uncertain terms to get off and stay off the Moon.”

unidentified-flying-object-stuff: “ the human soul could really be what the abduction phenomenon is all about ”

Scott Carpenter:

 

“At no time, when the astronauts were in space were they alone: there was a constant surveillance by UFOs.”

Religious fundamentalism will never accept that God, who creates sentient life, and Universes, does not ever, remotely inspire or  write books.

The Jewish Book of Fairy-tales mislead and helmeted the world in its accurate portrayal of “God”, as a vengeful, vindictive , quite mean-spirited ‘God’.

This was an intentional  masquerade that deceived Hebrews as it has fooled every other past civilization.

The sinister beings, likely reptilians, required obedience at the pain of death , provided a contrivance as a weapon and communication device (Ark of the Covenant), and that blood be splashed onto all four corners of the sacrificial altar,  more akin to demonic requirements, than divine.

 

They required that their Hebrew food-source did not poison them, when eaten (Kosher-dietary laws).

Our All-Loving God is down a long hall and somewhere else , a realization vectored away, by the Old Testament’s accounts of alien domination.

I have a precautionary frog story, for NASA and SETI,

and even worse, for the untold many hundreds of millions of world citizens who they have either knowingly duped,
a story that teaches the dangers of having cultivated a closed unimaginative mind.
.

Contrary to what SETI or NASA both state about not discovering the presence of aliens, Earth is and has long been a major crossroads for many species of alien races,
 a myriad variety of alien entities seen, but predominantly unseen and elusive, who frequent this planet.

But these truths are not self evident to we

 

late last year I made this big ol’ frog print for one of my classes! it was really fun, especially since we had to make it so big. The full-size print I have on my wall is 22x14 and it’s only slightly smaller than my cork board that’s under...
‘frogs’, who now dwell in abject ignorance about this mind boggling, greater truth:

Twice upon a time (maybe, even thrice upon a time), a frog who lived by the side of a vast blue-green ocean visited his distant frog cousin who lived very far away in a deep, small well in a very dark, small well.

.

“Isn’t my world amazing ?
Isn’t it wonderful and complex and totally beautiful?!”, said the cousin frog who lived in the cave in the dark deep well.
And the relative frog who lived by the side of a vast blue-green ocean said;”One day, my cousin, you must come and visit with me and see where I live and visit my home.
Frog shields its partner from the rain | Photography by ©Kutub Uddin facebook.com/AwesomeEarthPix
So it came to pass, that his cousin, one day, packed his suitcase and left his small well in the dark cave and traveled far to visit his cousin frog who lived by the wave-driven blue-green oceanImage result for tumblr gifs of frogs
And when the cousin from the small cave got there, he saw his frog cousin’s house on the beach and he viewed the unlimited expanse and spectacular majesty of the shore and the blue-green ocean,
and his head exploded

and he died.

Image result for tumblr gifs of exploding frogs head

Alien DNA

DNA AS ALIEN NANO-TECH : DARWIN COULD NOT IMAGINE ALIENS

by Paul Schroeder
God is responsible for the spiritual entities within our bodies, and there’s a harsh truth to face : aliens are the most likely candidates for the geniuses behind the amazing nanotech DNA which designs our life form physical bodies; there is no argument required.
The alien silhouette fingerprints, within our DNA, point to evidence that we were not ordained to this planet, by God, but by aliens , a newly revealed history and destiny for us, in this universe.
God, is true enough, but the O.T. Bible as a touchstone of “HIM”, with its myths and tales has no place in this DNA amended raised human consciousness, for cruel and deceptive reptilian aliens masqueraded as God, in ancient times.
The moon, much evidence suggests, was purposefully placed, on this reptilian preserve so as to minimize extremes in what-we-call- Earth’s climate, and seems to have actually been an ancient alien “craft”, now used as a base to ‘harvest’ and ‘trade’ humans, their seed and embryos, throughout the galaxy.
This ‘truth’ ,is down a long hall and somewhere else, far from what one might otherwise surmise..

The full truth is out there, and that is that we are not, nor have we ever been, the top of the food-chain.

These best games-keepers never let we animals within, suspect that Earth is , a preserve.


Biblical ‘dietary laws’ now reveal its owners’ tactics and true purposes, to harvest physically and spiritually, a better tasting and safer to eat harvest of humanity.After this horrid alien realization, any informed UFO researcher, must needs then become a vegetarian, for any moral and philosophical traction..
God, when not sabotaged by demonic or alien theft and recycling of life forces, imbues all physical DNA contrived sentient life with sparks of His spirit.
There are, however, many predominant planets whose entire intelligent life forms are spiritual entities,  and no physical DNA is required to house their spirit beings.
Our physical world is, amazingly, an anomaly, by virtue of the sheer numbers of many such non-corporeal worlds, by comparison.
Does human DNA reflect a computer code, of proteins and time-release enzymes, an alien nano-tech, and thus a no longer hidden fingerprint, of our “Creator”?
Scientists have found that our genetic code has all of these key computer code elements.
“The coding regions of DNA,” expostulates Dr. Stephen Meyer, “have exactly the same relevant properties as a computer code or language” (quoted by Strobel, p. 237, The Case for a Creator, 2004)
“Whose mind or what entity could shrink and miniaturize such information and place our DNA’s enormous number of ‘letters’ in their correct sequence as a genetic building block instruction manual?
Could evolution in itself have progressively come up with a nano-tech system like this?
It is difficult to fathom, but the quantum of information in our human DNA is roughly comparably equal to 12 sets of The Encyclopedia Britannica-an amazing 384 volumes worth of detailed data that would fill 48 feet long of required library shelves .”
“Yet in their precise size-only two millionths of a millimeter thick-a teaspoon of DNA, according to molecular biologist Michael Denton, has “all the information needed to build the proteins for all the species of organisms that have ever lived on the earth, and there would still be enough room left for all the information in every book ever written” (Evolution: A Theory in Crisis, 1996, p. 334).
                           Intelligent Design of our Human DNA
As scientists began to unravel and decode the human DNA molecule, they found something amazingly unexpected : a computer programmer’s exquisite ‘language’ composed of some 3 billion genetic letters.
“One of the most extraordinary discoveries of the twentieth century,” says Dr. Stephen Meyer, director of the Center for Science and Culture at the Discovery Institute in Seattle, Wash., “was that DNA actually stores information-the detailed instructions for assembling proteins-in the form of a four-character digital code” (quoted by Lee Strobel, The Case for a Creator, 2004, p. 224).
As George Williams explains it: “The gene is a package of information, not an object. The pattern of base pairs in a DNA molecule specifies the gene.
But the DNA molecule is the medium, it’s not the message”
(quoted by Johnson, p. 70).
  Design from an intelligent source
To any discerning mind, this type of nano-tech high-level information originates only from a technologically advanced intelligent source.
As Lee Strobel explains: “The data at the core of life is not disorganized, it’s not simply orderly like salt crystals, but it’s complex and specific information that can accomplish a bewildering task-the building of biological machines that far outstrip human technological capabilities” (p. 244).
“For example, the precise nature of this genetic language is such that the average error that is not caught turns out to be one error per 10 billion letters.
If an error occurs in one of the most important parts of the code, in the genes, it causes diseases such as sickle-cell anemia. Yet even the best and most apt typist in the world couldn’t come close to making only one mistake per 10 billion letters-far from it.”
Michael Behe, a biochemist and professor at Pennsylvania’s Lehigh University, explains that DNA genetic data is primarily an instruction manual.
He reasons: “Consider a step-by-step list of [genetic] instructions. A mutation is a change in one of the lines of instructions.
So instead of saying, “Take a 1/4-inch nut,” a mutation might say, “Take a 3/8-inch nut.” Or instead of “Place the round peg in the round hole,” we might get “Place the round peg in the square hole” . . .
What a mutation cannot do is change all the instructions in one step-say, [providing instructions] to build a fax machine instead of a radio”.
(Darwin’s Black Box, 1996, p. 41).
We therefore have, in our human genetic code, a complex instruction manual eloquently designed by a more highly intelligent source than even the genius of human beings.
The God agnostic and recently deceased Francis Crick, one of the discoverers of DNA, after decades of work deciphering it, admitted that:
“an honest man, armed with all the knowledge available to us now, could only state that in some sense, the origin of life appears at the moment to be almost a miracle, so many are the conditions which would have had to have been satisfied to get it going” .
(Life Itself, 1981, p. 88, emphasis added).
Dean Kenyon, a biology professor who repudiated his earlier book on Darwinian evolution-because of discoveries of information found in DNA-states:
 “This new realm of molecular genetics (is) where we see the most compelling evidence of design on the Earth” (ibid., p. 221).
As well, one of the world’s most famous atheists, Professor Antony Flew, admitted that he couldn’t explain how DNA was created and developed through evolution.
He now sees the demanding need for an intelligent source to have been involved in the making of our human DNA code.
“What I think the DNA material has done is show that intelligence must have been involved in getting these extraordinary diverse elements together,” he said (quoted by Richard Ostling, “Leading Atheist Now Believes in God,” Associated Press report, Dec. 9, 2004).
” I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made . .”
 Written some thousands of years ago, King David’s words about our alien constructed human bodies seems most true.
He wrote: “For You formed my inward parts, You covered me in my mother’s womb.
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made . . . My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought. . .” (Psalm 139:13-15, ).
Where does all this deposit the theory of evolution?
Michael Denton, an agnostic scientist, concludes:
“Ultimately the Darwinian theory of evolution is no more nor less than the great cosmogenic myth of the twentieth century” (Denton, p. 358).
Thus we are left like a precipitate out of a solution with an astounding Creator nano-tech design that every life-form on Earth carries,” a similar and related genetic code programmned by our extraterrestrial maker and that evolution is hardly what we deduce that it is it .”
This discovery shall shake our roots of humanity and confirm or deny our beliefs, both in our concept of a Creator as well as in our own concept of our destiny.
Within this  paradigm, all forms of life farmed throughout the Universe can be seen as an enormous molecular nanotech creation by a intelligent Creator using amino acid thoughts, expressed mathematically.
Crick, DNA’s discoverer, perhaps, said it best:
“Life did not evolve first on Earth, a highly advanced civilization became threatened so they devised a way to pass on their existence.”
“They genetically-modified their DNA and sent it out from their planet on bacteria or meteorites with the hope that it would collide with another planet. It did, and that’s why we’re here.”
“The DNA molecule is the most efficient information storage system in the entire universe.
The immensity of complex, coded and precisely sequenced information is absolutely staggering. “
“The DNA evidence speaks of intelligent, information-bearing design.
Complex DNA coding would have been necessary for even the hypothetical first ‘so-called’ simple cell(s).
Our DNA was encoded with messages from that other civilization.”
“They programmed the molecules so that when we reached a certain level of intelligence, we would be able to access their information, and they could therefore “teach” us about ourselves, and how to progress. For life to form by chance is mathematically virtually impossible.”

And The Meek Shall Inherit the Earth

And The Meek Shall Inherit the Earth

Paul Schroeder's picture

And the Meek shall Inherit the Earth

by Paul Schroeder
“To consider the earth as the only populated world in infinite space is as absurd as to assent that, in an entire field sown with millet, only one grain would grow…”
Metrodorus, Greek sage Fourth Century BC
It had been two full days since the darkness and rain had begun.
On May 11th, 700 people crammed into an auditorium that seated only five hundred.
It began to rain in torrents,

a rain unlike any other rain.

It rained streams, drenching and swelling, a deluge of rain and it rained and it never stopped raining.
It was a rain that turned rivulets into streams and streams into frozen rivers.
It molted the bushes and trees of leaves and it shrank the wet hands of men into the shriveled claws of apes.
The rain slapped a half lit cigarette from Dr. Paul Schroeder’s hand as he entered the hall, cupped his hands from the rain to shelter his cigarette lighter.
Dark storm clouds threatened; in the distance thunder rumbled.
https://i1.wp.com/www.veteranstoday.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/alien-midway.jpg
Dr. Schroeder was 58 years old,
 chain smoked cigarettes, as he paced nervously and he gesticulated nervously with his hands as he spoke.
He stood on the auditorium stage of St. John’s University Avery Hall, behind a lit lectern with a yellow spotlight surrounding him.

As he spoke, on a large screen behind him flashed preprogrammed 35 mm slides in five second intervals, photos of UFOs and artist’s renderings of myriad alien life forms.Alien Mind Scan

In the back of the auditorium, a priest in a dark double breasted suit slipped into the hall during the screen change and sat in the last row,
 twisted in the seat, topped by a  wet, yellow rain hood which hid his blue eyes.
The voice on the microphone was deep and resonant:
“The darkness and rain in America  has made the front page in every nation in the world. “
“But, here in America, the press did not cover that at 8 o’clock, at the same moment on the other side of the world,  a rain and gloom descended without hints of clouds throughout Sri Lanka and all of Zanzibar.”

“UFOs were seen in the skies in both parts of the world just before the rain and the darkness fell, in America and in Zanzibar.”

“Perhaps the fate of the Earth and the continuation of human life forms hang in the balance.”
“Although unpredictable, all sightings of UFO’s and all abduction experiences have a shared purpose:
to change human consciousness and its relationship to the world and to each other and to replace mankind. “
” I  call it, “The Noah Effect.”
“We, on Earth, have been for millennia like fleas on a dog’s pelt,  convinced that  our world has been ordained perfectly for our existence; but that theory falls apart when the dog’s mistress gets a flea collar.”
“The human genome research  tells us that within ‘junk DNA’, the time intervals for alien DNA manipulation were respectively 25,000, 15,000, 5,000 and 2,500 years ago.”
“What this means is that the interaction between aliens, UFOs and us is not just a 20 th century phenomenon, but rather, one of millennia; it turns out that we are somebody’s experiment.”
“They may very well have farmed us throughout the Universe.”
“There is even evidence that aliens placed our Moon to stabilize Earth’s wobble and climatic fluctuations.”
He shook his head wistfully;
“Moses and the burning bush, and Jesus’ ascension, Fatima, Abraham,
the founder of the Mormon Church,  simply encountered creatures known for  abduction experiences.”
Image result for tumblr gifs of shape shifting aliens
“For the first time in human consciousness and human history we are now studying something that had been studying us, but our insights and realizations of what is happening was always vectored off.”

“We are in the proverbial corridor of mirrors with a quicksand floor.”

lsd aliens GIF
“When one hears about a string of boxcars on a railroad track that suddenly goes straight up in the air, a little biplane that moves into fog and comes out a disc, a silent helicopter which turns into a disc, or oil barrels in Oklahoma that rise vertically straight up, one realizes that there is something about this phenomenon, at every level, that seems to be disguising itself.”
Alien Mind Scan
“And now the rains and the darkness have descended upon the Earth”
In the background the screen showed a being-type that was half reptile and half human; a smooth lizard-skinned reptilian, eight feet tall with a saurian face.
It had a four-clawed hand with brown webbing between the fingers.

The caption underneath the picture read:

“This reptile type has cat-like eyes with gold-slit pupils.

This being is sinister and deceptive in manner.”

Schroeder’s voice loomed over the crowded auditorium:
” DNA research tells us that all races on Earth today, no matter how diverse, came from a common ancestor, a single pair of parents who lived 128,000 years ago. :Noah.”
“The Bible states that God chose Noah to survive because he was a righteous man, who
 followed God’s laws. ‘
“That was the only criteria for his and his seed’s survival .
“The blueprints,  architectural directions  to make up each dimension of the ark , hardly a spiritual, divine philosophical guidance, were specific directions to build a worthy seafaring ship.”
“Everyone but Noah’s line vanished in darkness of waters and the very same thing appears to be poised to happen, again, today.
Image result for tumblr gifs of slum

Aliens, through exams of abductees seem to be testing for the mystery of goodness in human beings.”

” Apparently, the rarity in the race of mankind for the propensity of goodness, is worth saving and perhaps even a mystery to them.”
He looked towards the far end of the auditorium into the darkness .
” Why would a priest deny material wealth and sacrifice his life for helping the poor?”

“Why would a G. I. throw himself on a live grenade, to save a group of men in a trench that he had never met ?”

Image result for tumblr gif of gi jumping on a grenade
“This strange darkness and the flooding rains that will not stop as well as the alien craft that fill the skies above all nations suggest that the human race, in its present form, may well be facing its end.”
The priest stood and from the back of the auditorium, in a stentorian voice, addressed Dr. Schroeder:
“I disagree; that’s a rather childish, religious view.”
” Gods MAY have intervened directly in the affairs of mankind:  the malevolence of the Holocaust,  great famines, plagues,   terrible suffering on Earth.
“Last month,  psychics who work in the intelligence community.
 have uniformly learned that a council of nine from a Galactic Trade Union, representing some fifty worlds, will not interfere; they were told outright:
“You are a small planet of no particular significance.”
“We can’t look for help anywhere but in ourselves.
Our government policy is a confused mixture of denial and cover-ups which fuel conspiracy theories.”
“In truth, for them, this whole phenomenon is excruciating.”
“It is, after all, the business of government to protect its people.”
“Our government knew all along that if it affirmed and acknowledged that alien beings from radar-defying craft which defied gravity and space time had long been invading homes and abducting its citizens, it would cause world-wide political and religious upheavals and  world economic upheavals.”
“So the secret stayed a secret in the name of national security ,
an oxymoron.”
“The traces of post-abduction are subtle: bad dreams, fast growing hair and fingernails, there is a detectable luminous phosphorescence on abductee’s skin, detectable with black light.”
“Alien abductees are resistant to pain- killers, like Novocain and may even awaken during surgery.”
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“I’ve noticed that abductees have much higher serotonin levels than other people do;
 higher levels of serotonin may make it easier for alien entities to contact these people.”

“But the unhappy evidence suggests that most people who have entered an alien spaceship will not remember the experience or ever know what has happened to them except in recollections of so-called dreams or under medical hypnosis.”

ABDUCTION | Original
“But few people can remember or even examine their dreams, dreams lost, as they struggle into consciousness each morning.”
“Throughout the world,” he said, “abduction has long been a frightening experience that many therapists would rather not acknowledge unless symptoms resulting from the encounter require them to do so.”
“For most people it’s just terrifying nightmares that they barely remember.”
He put his hands in his pockets and fished for another pack of cigarettes.
“My understanding of the alien-phenomenon has grown:
“Small, large-eyed, telepathic creatures are playing at Frankenstein in space suits, genetically engineering a “new” hybrid creature, the best of both their race and mankind’s, to replace us, who they feel are the destroyers of this planet.”
“The ones who show courage, charity, self sacrifice and openness will be saved, along with their seed.”
He sighed; “Like Neanderthals, who vanished mysteriously, today’s breed of mankind has been judged and again, the verdict is annihilation.”
He suddenly grew angry.
“Doesn’t it strike you that there is an inherent burning irony?” he said.
“Although these creatures are seeking the complex, extraordinary nature of what goodness is in us, they must be morally depraved themselves,  to turn the whole world into a flooded Auschwitz!”
PART 2

In Lynne, Oklahoma, at the Church of Martyrs diocese, Father Daniel Mahoney, a priest, was sitting in the rectory library.
‘He possessed a fine, beatific quality delicate for all his great size and his enormous eyes, far-looking blue circles of innocence, especially when seen against the black cloth of a priest’s habit, were an impressive sight.’
He was surrounded by copies of daily newspapers, but his attention was captured by a moldy, historical, manuscript and he read aloud:

“Such strangeness and such mysterious facts, those sudden shadows that fall in broad daylight when there is neither any cloudiness nor an eclipse.

The typical case is one that occurred on December 20, 1484, in Preston, England: toward noon, the sky became completely black, to the point that animals lay down and went to sleep.
Twenty minutes later, the sun reappeared. We know of several hundred cases of this type, without having any explanation for them.”
It has been suggested that they are caused by thick clouds of smoke from forest fires, but generally there has been no sign of forest fires at the time of these incidents, and when there has been, these smoke clouds have never been observed between the spot where the fire took place and the place where the phenomenon occurred.

The strangest of these darkening phenomena occurred in London on August 19, 1763.
The most amazing thing about this occurrence was that the shadows seemed to have been completely impenetrable by lantern or candlelight. If this was a case of smoke so thick it would have left traces on objects and did not.”
PART 3
Outside, the rain poured like an overhead river from dark skies; the streets were ponds and small lakes which crept steadily to cover gardens and sidewalks.
The priest took the subway home and walked upstairs to his fourth floor walk up apartment.

In the sink under a dripping, dripping, dripping faucet, were old sardine tins, cans of half eaten food, half- smoked cigar butts and dirty dishes.

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The room reeked of life lived too long with the windows closed.
He put on the television and sat on the end of the bed, removing his priestly vestments, mouthing aloud the names like a holy litany:
“cassock, dalmatics, tunic, surplice, maniple, amice, alb, and cincture.”

When he desperately wanted something from God or he was in real trouble, he would recite the words as his own private prayer.
He lit a remnant of a cigar and put the butt out on the frame of the mattress.

He swung his legs to the floor and stepped barefoot onto a large cockroach.

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White- faced, he sat on the bed again and scraped the remnants of the cockroach off of his foot with a matchbook cover, and grinned with the deeper muscles of his face.
He took a syringe from under his pillow and stuck it in his arm.
He was dreaming the same dream again.
He was walking the crowded cobblestone streets to Golgotha; in the angry crowd that thronged the crowded streets he saw his parents, their heads shaven, their purple gums conversing in clicks like bushmen.
He woke with a start.

A large, potted plant across the room shook violently, incomprehensibly.

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He stared and his jaw dropped slowly.
He felt a slight depression on the end of the bed; something feather- light and invisible had just jumped up, catlike on the blanket.
The ancient floorboards by his bed creaked, then by his dresser, then by the window.
He was frightened by the sense that there was somebody in the room with him, he couldn’t see .
He fought the impulse to jump up.

Then despite fear of such intensity that it caused him to shake, he lay down again on the bed to escape his fear.

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Overhead above the red bricked four story apartment building, a silver colored football shaped object hovered.
In the darkness and in the pouring rain, a craft had appeared from nowhere suddenly.
It was mostly gray in color, with a bright purple light on one side and a small blinking blue light on the other,
double-decked with two rows of lighted windows; the light coming from them was bluish-white and phosphorescent.
The craft was about fifty feet long and maybe twenty feet thick.
Two vertical side seams in the structure and lines of rivets along the seams were lit up by the red glow of the underside where reddish vapor was being discharged.
Yellowish vapor oozed from one of the ends and the craft settled behind a large sycamore tree.
At that moment, the television program in the next room was completely washed out in static.
A beeping noise.
He rose into a waiting craft as he watched his body below, recede from view.
A wild torrent of precipitation.
Continuous waves of rain that screamed, boiled and whispered.
Then the green oceans covered the Earth.
The first wave that hit cut coastal cities off from a world that had bubbled in the direct pour of moonlight, stiff waves, then a  mountainous whistling skyscraper of a wave, brutal, and then a row of like mountainous waves.
Sky – touched brine tsunamis of oceans, valleys of seas, cascading waves and roiling heights, lowered a scrim over the harsh world and erased all land traces.

A planet of waves a thousand feet tall, rolled in on all the battered coasts of the world and drowned all traces of land.

Mountains of green thunder towered onto and consumed Earth and every living thing that could breathe air.

Deluged months of torrential oceans and then calmer years of heavy rain, continuous waves of rain that  boiled and whispered.

A century of wild torrent, precipitation’s white fountains stiff waves, and then

 dry land emerged.


Flotillas of oval craft descended from the heavens, laden with seed, corms and fruit trees and a newer crop :
a race of silent, hairless, thin beings walked upon the planet in quiet contemplation.
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And on a Spring day in early April, the clouds cleared and rainbows were born :

The meek, had inherited the Earth.

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THE NOONDAY DEVILS : UNDERSTANDING the ANXIETY ATTACKS

The Noonday Devils: Understanding the Anxiety Attacks

Paul Schroeder's picture

Psychics well know that along with psychic gifts, come awful penalties.

Part of the alarming nature of the unknown is its mysterious link to the known; I awaken each night to a lewd exhibition of the merging.

I open my eyes and turn to see the digital alarm clock, sitting on the lamp table next to my bed and see: 12:12, and 1:11 am, 2:22 am and 3:33 am and 4:44 am.

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This distresses me so badly, upon awakening, that I cannot think; a wave of panic that SOMETHING is awakening me, with alacrity, strikes me, as the calculated odds of awakening each night precisely at those specific times is, without question, astronomically impossible.

The message intended seems designed to throw me off balance, to keep me wrapped in fearful confusion; it lets me know that I am being toyed with but yields no greater insight.

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It has taught me that when I sleep I wander amongst adept monsters and psychic beastly company.

Sometimes after abductions, the inter dimensional door, left open, invites the gangster fringe element of the spirit world, worse, sometimes, demons are thrown into the equation as spite work, for attempts at thwarting abductions.

As my spirituality increases, it appears that I am become more of an increasing beacon, a porch light, for psychic moths and then bats, Dark Force entities.

Amazingly, NOT all of those negative energies afoot, earthbound, are human!

Some are reptilians.

One of my growing psychic sensitivities, an allergy of sorts, is that as an early warning system, my skin burns locally with a painful ‘buzzing’, when a negative thought entity intrudes upon my energies and starts a ‘connection.’

In such a moment, if sprayed holy water from a plant misting bottle fails to end the pain, I seek a powerful and usually successful ethereal cleansing technique, using running shower water to ‘wash’, as I visualize washing dark energy down the drain.

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It is a defensive tool I have learned to use, to combat the build up of static electricity, EMF connections associated with the pinching, painful ‘touch’ of predatory, stubborn, unseen and almost ‘hungry’ entities.

One particular unseen entity awed and baffled me when, rather than vanish, it used the shower water’s energy to partially materialize, for a full moment or two to study me, an energy lunch which actually resisted, and refused to be nibbled at!

 

It had suddenly drained energy from me, had burned my skin where connections touched, and had buzzed me within, psychically; sudden, unprovoked sexual urges and odd, negative ideation had surfaced.

These are two of the signature symptoms of all negative thought entities.

To my horror and disbelief, right next to me, under the shower’s waters, a creature had semi-materialized.

It had stared me right in the eye, had blinked and had looked again.

It stood under five feet upright, with catlike slit eyes, and had closely resembled a scaled monitor lizard, in aspect and facial structure.

The reptilian had viewed me with its head tilted, cocked sideways, birdlike; it had piercingly studied me with an alert intelligence that had radiated a proprietary curiosity.

After a few seconds, the creature had vanished. Still under the shower’s waters, I had remained frozen, in sheer amazement and could not believe my eyes; I had seen a creature that I had never imagined existed, similar in construct to the raptor creatures, in Steven Spielberg’s film, “Jurassic Park”.

It had a proprietary and sinister demeanor.

Like those cinema raptors, this short, upright standing reptile had an expression that mirrored intense saurian intellect, a precise cross between a conscious man and a physical reptile.

I had been horrified to glimpse a momentary semi- materialized, inquisitive, immature reptilian ‘alien’, because it had long had a reputation in UFO literature and research, as an inter dimensional bottom feeder, a sinister common parasite of human consciousness and a clear overlord of all other alien entities, who often pilot UFO craft.

These beings perceive us merely as,”containers”, to supplant themselves within our minds and bodies.(Earthfiles.com)

Post abduction, alien abductee depredation, is done through implant energy drains and by inserting alien energy astral attachments, within the layered human psyche, towards a goal of partial and total, eventual possession.

After initial physical human abductions, reptilian/grey possessing energies are subsequently deposited, not unlike the lamprey parasites that they are, within the multi layered human psyche/mind.

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Aliens and their predatory relationships with mankind have always been here and hollow Earth reptilians are as native and terrestrial to our planet as are thunderstorms; they are the game wardens of this preserve that we call, ‘Earth, and like good game wardens, they do not let the creatures within, suspect that it is, indeed, a preserve.

Reptilians, as evidenced by the shower incident, are inter dimensional, as well as inter galactic and

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can and do use the same dimension that ghosts and demons use to enter and exit our reality.

The lower Earth animal forms seen as reptiles, amphibians, insects are mirrored and echoed by the higher technological forms which have been seen aboard craft who have lent their DNA to create this preserve.

We , too, are constructs of their creative meddling.

When people ask them,”Where are you from?” Where do you come from?”, they are often told,”We come from within”,
as ‘alien’ energies, deep within the multi layered human psyche/mind.

 

Evil is as evil does: kidnapping, rape, telepathic attack, possession, medical procedures, psychic attacks causing anxiety,  internal mind-to-mind-insidious, omnipresent whispers, micro-managing of our emotions, energies and sexuality through implant drains.

The Alien Relationship to mankind, is one of treating us like guinea pigs, orchestrating joys, disasters and horrors into our lives to milk us of energy; isn’t that enough of a definition of ‘evil’?

Evil’s definition of predatory, sinister and self-justifying is more than satisfied with these overlord reptilian entities.

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Imagine a city-scape of people, all of who have juvenile saurian parasites ethereally attached to their spinal columns.

 

It lends a new meaning of present horror to the concept of a silent invasion.

 

These bizarre reptilian beings, highly technological, dimensional and intergalactic, use us much as we ride horses.

Unlike the hesitant touch of a lost negative earthbound human spirit, the unseen reptilian had prevailed with sharpest painful burning, a much stronger negative entity, I surmised, and certainly more persistent than anything unseen I had previously psychically encountered.

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Worse, it now seemed stuck like chewing gum, on the bottom of my psychic ‘shoe’.

Morning and night, this persistent horrid entity feasted on my energies like an unerring, stubborn yellow jacket wasp, fancying me like a can of cola at a picnic with the same insect stubbornness. .

Imposed nightmares were vivid and dazzling in the extreme.

I had taken that shower out of sheer desperation, and had glimpsed something most certainly NOT human which had radiated a brilliance of intellect.

(most commonly seen round UFOs are for human abductions and most pilot predators within governed by  reptilians.)

I am sadly sure that my reptoid microcosm experience of depredation and Dark Force energy, reflects the greater human macrocosm depredation globally, by these unseen reptilian entities…

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I have, however, learned from these encounters, that anxiety is the soul’s natural reaction to psychic intrusion; sudden or slowly building free floating anxiety means that something, an entity unseen, prying and opportunistic, has just entered your energies to peek within.

That took me a long time to deduce, wrestling with horrid anxiety.

 

Imagine the global implications of such a therapeutic insight, in abject relief to sufferers of anxiety attacks, but this truth is still down a long hall and somewhere else.

This assertion can be tested, simply:

One who experiences anxiety, a panic attack onset, can “order it, away!”, like a fly at one’s mustache, “in the name of God”; the anxiety will abate immediately and then re-surge again as the entity responds initially and withdraws and then floats in again.

As its nature is usually sinister, stubborn, and predatory, anxiety levels will climb again.

Repeat the procedure, but now, with stronger insistence and with more anger. Anxiety will abate, for a longer time, immediately.

Again, a wave of free floating anxiety will reestablish a foothold, anew, as demonic or grey- reptilian intrusion approaches within your energies, again.

Who would have ever guessed that Panic Attacks are psychic/telepathic intrusions, astral hitchhiking, by a reptilian or a demoniac?

Like yellow jacket wasps at a picnic can of cola, this reptilian entity was unerring, persistent and sinister; the anxiety and wild vivid “dreams” were mere symptoms, not the disease, itself, which was reptilian telepathic intrusion and attack.

 

Knowledge is power, towards attaining spiritual independence.

This budding psychic’s encounter with a juvenile reptilian, when compared to an encounter with an earthbound ghost, was like the difference between lightning, and a lightning bug.

 BIO:

Abductions and their remnant elusive memories have opened all this for Paul, a confirmed atheist, until he saw aliens float him out of his body, in his bed, at night. Then, he knew that they were interested in an essence he never suspected that he had; a soul. Our spiritual powers that interest and addict interdimensionals are the very powers that can be used to thwart further attacks.

They infect auras with attachments to themselves and ride the reincarnation roller coaster with people, to avoid the death that they fear and to steal the spiritual recycling that we have.

These joyriding grays can be sinister, discorporate alien souls ,stuck to your energies, who bring a new meaning to the concept of a silent invasion.

“For we are fighting with people not made of flesh and blood, but against persons without bodies—evil rulers of the unseen world, those mighty satanic beings and great evil princes of darkness who rule this world, and against huge numbers of wicked spirits in high places.

Put on all God’s armor so that you will be able to stand safe.” Ephesians 6.

 

TALKING TO HEAVEN, BUT LOST IN TRANSLATION

TALKING TO HEAVEN, BUT, LOST IN TRANSLATION

by Paul Schroeder

Translation trip- ups, are screw-ups, mistakes that can alter reality.

 

President Carter visited Poland, in 1977.

 

Through an inexperienced translator, Carter said,” for your desires in the future”, which instead was wrongly translated as,”your lusts for the future”, and said,
“When I left the United States”, which came out as,”when I abandoned the United States”, mistakes that the press found amusing.
Nikita Khrushchev, gave a speech, at the U.N., during the Cold War, in which he said a phrase, interpreted wrongly in Russian,” We will bury you!”,
which gave cause for alarm to NSA and CIA, when the more accurate meaning was actually,
“We will outlast you!”

 One’s personal destiny, much like history, is also affected by such screw-ups in translation.

 

I had the same interpretive conundrum trying to communicate with angelic beings, spirit helpers and my Higher Self,

for I desperately needed spiritual help, protection against untoward, unpleasant and unwanted paranormal experiences.

 

 I felt that perhaps I could also be able to assist myself, because I  knew fully well that

the human mind, in itself, has Godlike  powers, to alter reality.

The mind, the conscious soul, by sheer force of  will, is able to  alter our  predetermined and programmed  ‘reality’,

 our life- scenarios,  pre-arranged in a blueprint.

This blueprint,  carefully pre-planned by us, our spirit helpers, and guides,  before our birth, is for spiritual learning, within this school, that we call, “Earth”..

But the more that I fervently prayed, with angst, to Heaven to  cease and desist paranormal untoward horrid experiences , the more things got worse.

 I had close encounter sightings of overhead UFOs and  then suffered subsequent abductions by, brilliantly diabolical reptilians, who imposed vivid, nightmares.

My prayers, all my life heard, and responded to,  now failed to elicit  spiritual help.

My mind also failed to translate its power to tell ‘reality’,  to stop paranormal encounters that loomed as dreadful.

I discovered that fearful pleading to Heaven for respite and relief did NOT mean that one had the language to effectively communicate.

Why did things get worse, after  desperately fervent prayer?

Why were my experiences worsening and  my intense requests lost, in translation?

I felt an electric mortal terror of alien critters.

After abductions, I felt harmed, threatened and  wounded.

 My fervent prayers to Heaven’s Hosts for  protective relief  were ignored

I needed access to a more correct language, to reach Heaven’s ears, the spiritual software in spirituality to reprogram my blueprint, while still submerged  in life’s midstream .

But instead,  my  suffering  expressed in focused prayers, made all Hell break loose:

Ghosts, demons, shadow people, poltergeist phenomena, dreadful , vivid nightmares, Out of Body Experiences, and aliens in overhead craft who abducted me.

  I was flirting with an onslaught of inter dimensional bleed-throughs,  and face to face with The Beast of Madness.​

I  agonized over my thwarted  spiritual rights  to demand cessation, seek balance, grounding and  protection, from my angels, my guides, God and my Higher Self.

 But, the more that I worried, petitioned and implored, in despair, to Heaven, to end  bizarre encounters, the more that unholy creatures carrying butter knives, pranced naked, into my bedroom.

The uninvited fully devoured me, at night.

Why does the buttered slice of bread always fall butter side down?

It’s not the weight of the butter.
I herein share a mystic’s revelation,  that took me ten years to discover.

Fearful worrying,  negative energy, manifests those very things, that keep you up at night, worrying about.

Since your energy goes where your attention goes, chronic fearful worry, only brings more wolves, to all of your doors.

Though we are not ever alone in this life, we may as well be, for our Higher Self, spirit helpers, angels and spirit guides, do NOT use the King’s English, in the same way as we do.
Communication from you to them  is interpreted,

not by  words, but by the inner focus of the mind’s emotional energy.

It’s a translation problem, that makes things that you desperately seek cessation from, to continue to manifest in your direct path.
Lost in translation, the spirit world  naturally and wrongly  assumes, that  horrid events, are precisely what you are asking for!
Like trying to avoid a dangerous road obstruction, just ahead, in front of you, while you are driving, your  fearful focused gaze directed at it, only helps you, to hit it.

The translation software apparatus that works  requires that  you never despair, or resign yourself to grief.

Like a weary survivor lost at sea, tired of swimming , in terror, that he will drown, who decides to end his suffering agony, by

 inhaling a merciful  lungful of water, exemplifies how  negative fear and worry bring about ruination.

The  spiritual translation software instead  requires the  swimmer to relax and float, expectantly grateful,
with relief , certain of a wondrous rescue.
However counter-intuitive this may feel, then spiritual help will begin on its way.
 The  translation- language, to reach  those, ‘behind one’s curtains’,  requires one  to

 feel GRATEFUL, THANKFUL, and JOYFUL, as though full relief  has already been afforded you.

 

This  translation program,  however oblique and counter-intuitive, is an emotional software language  which works.
                                   Program translation RULE
Stay positive.
Simpsons Fox cartoon
Shift  from the negative
unhappiness expressed in :
“Oh, MY DEAR God!,  I beg you, PLEASE help me with——–!”,
to:
“THANK YOU, GOD, for your wondrous help in successfully keeping all traces of——– forever far away from me!”,
 an inner emotional stance of THANKFULNESS, APPRECIATION, GRATITUDE and RELIEF,

AS THOUGH WHAT YOU DESPERATELY SOUGHT ,  from Heaven,

HAD ALREADY  BEEN DELIVERED TO YOU…

  Like magic,  I was finally able to communicate passed translation bottlenecks, using  emotional relief and deep gratitude, regarding my travails.

 

Rather than send  more wolves, Heaven instead began to perfect a remedy for me.

A spiritual technophobe, slow to learn,  it took me ten years to figure this out.
A prayer request using RELIEF combined with GRATEFULNESS,   gains and re-adjusts ‘the ear’ of our Higher Selves, angels and spirit helpers, who manifest reality for us,  according to the emotional energy focus, of our heart and  mind.
.

Paranormal inter- dimensional untoward bleed-through experiences  have  diminished, in ferocity and incidence, as a direct result of this ‘language’ software shift in demeanor, to

lend a new meaning, to the expression, “from your lips to God’s ears” .
God is real, but down a long hall, and somewhere else, other than organized religions’ (and the Bible’s ) wrongheadedness.

MILITARY COMBAT MEMORY OF MY FATHER


COMBAT AND MILITARY MEMORY OF MY FATHER : I COULD HAVE TOLD HIM THAT I LOVED HIM

Paul Schroeder

Combat and Military Memory of my Father: I Could Have Told Him That I Loved Him
by Paul Schroeder
My father parachuted into Germany and was captured that same week; he and his Screaming Eagles company buddies were holed up in a farmhouse armed with machine guns when a Tiger Tank rolled up to it and put its muzzle into a window and fired.
He recalled his ferocious gnawing hunger and told me that at the prisoner of war camp at night, when he slept, mice would creep into his buttoned shirt vest pocket to steal the few crumbs of bread he had hidden there before he could awaken and slap his pocket.
He weighed eighty-eight pounds when he was liberated.
At another time, on a work detail outside and beyond the barbed wire fence, he saw a skeletal group of Jews, literally walking skeletons, and in abject pity he threw a piece of his bread over a fence to them, which they all frantically scrambled for.
The supervising German sergeant of those doomed Jews saw him do this and walked over to him and put a Luger into my father’s mouth and pulled the trigger.
The gun misfired.
Twice.
His mind and lifelong emotional mental state were never the same after that incident, and for the rest of his life he remained tortured, an unhappy and mostly unpleasant man.
He would, many years later, angrily retrieve moldy bread and brown wilted lettuce from the trash, raging about ,’wasted food’, and we all learned that for our peace of mind, food garbage had to be thrown into the incinerator, long before he came home, from work.
He told me that he witnessed the killings of women who had assisted anti-Nazi resistance fighters, women who were hung from piano wires in a slow strangulation that delighted and entertained the German Waffen S.S.
But he seemed calm telling me that it took some over an hour to die, in this fashion, from this form of German murder, for the the slimmest, most lightweight women who were hanged, struggled longer against their nooses.
The prisoner of war camp’s confinement had chafed his soul.
Even long after the war he could escape the inglorious restraints and confinements of marriage and work , by seeking the open ocean to fish for striped bass and bluefish.
He loved fishing more than anything or anyone, in his life, and ached for fishing, to be free and alone on a landscape of waves, with only gulls for company.
He spent all of his spare time, nights and weekends, alone on the open Atlantic ocean, a peaceful landscape of land escape, far from dangerous and murderous distant coastlines.
When he thought that I was old enough to be of assistance to him, he brought me into his escapist world of fishing solitude, and far out on the waters of the Atlantic, far from any constricting shore, told me his memories, of a horrific war. .
When I was young, eight, nine and ten years of age, my father woke me every Friday night at 2:00 A.M. and by three fifteen A.M. we were out in the waters of Long Island, in his boat, fishing for striped bass and bluefish until the sun came up and fish stopped feeding and taking lures.
We watched the gulls; wherever they were raucous and feeding, we caught many large fish, as schools were underneath, forcing the bait to the surface, which attracted the birds. It was a foolproof technique.
After the sun came up, we sat and jigged the bottom for fluke and flounders, languid bottom feeders, while we sat under the shade of the Marine Parkway Bridge.
Bereft of the engine’s roar and the slap of the waves against a speeding hull, we sat, and he would speak to me of the horrors he had seen.
Every weekend of my youth was spent this way, catching large fish.
I was agog and seasick for days afterwards.
The pitched sickness of the waves, the sharp sour stink of fish, the stench of gasoline from the engine, the foul pungent odor of the, ‘piss-can’ and his poignant recollections of the horrors that he had seen during the war, combined to make me deathly ill, each time that we fished together..
I envisioned deep trenches in the furrows of the waves, filled with sobbing, and doomed families of Jews, as German Waffen S.S. driven bulldozers, pushed tons of soil atop them, to bury them, alive.
Once, after listening to such tales, told to me in his low, monotone voice, I eventually noticed that each time I netted and landed a fish into the boat, the water would swirl and splash a few seconds afterwards, and I asked my father the cause of this bizarre occurrence.
He blithely told me, casting a lure from the boat, that the fish’s mate would break the water, seeking his lost mate, following after, in a futile search.
In that moment, with the boat at my feet filled with flopping fish, jaws gaping in airy suffocation, the horrors in his stories resurfaced:
dead children in the streets, who resembled dolls, their jaws and eyes open,
skeletal Jews with pleading eyes,
children murdered before their parents’ eyes,
of a Waffen S.S. who used his machine pistol to separate a close knit family, and of their wails of separation, which years later, would ring in my father’s head.
I suddenly realized, in horror, that each swirl and splash of water, after I had pulled one fish into the boat, was a mate and thus a broken heart, that fish were individuals, with feelings, and not just mere products!
The horror of fish, dead and dying at my feet, of loved ones’ final, forceful separation, in a frozen moment, broke my young heart, and I found and resolved, that I could no longer bear to catch, or to ever again, eat fish.
Recalling these memories is not a freeing and therapeutic catharsis, instead I feel a sad nostalgia, a morbid whimsy .
As a writer, it is difficult to capture the strained, forced familiarity of families’ troubled interactions, governed by fruits of traumas, into words.
I have carefully locked the vault door against the worst recollections, the horrors of living with him; he had absorbed the repeated brutality of his experiences.
Throughout life, he radiated the same heavy-handed violence to those all around him, using fists, where a word, instead, might suffice.
Those recollections, if unlocked behind my mind’s protective vault doors, would make these experiences, herein, pale, by comparison.
When I can hazard to open those vault doors, doors made of three feet of steel, therapeutic and freeing might then ensue.
Debriefing combat troops, is still nonexistent; one arrives fresh from combat to San Diego Airport or Kennedy International Airport.
The injuries that our most recent troops have sustained in Iraq and Afghanistan, unseen and unmeasured injuries, are deep and painful scars on their souls; many, after drug and alcohol addiction fails to assuage their grief, take their own lives, in suicides suffering from combat angst beyond words.
I recall General Patton coming under criticism for slapping the face of and calling a coward, a young soldier, in a field hospital, who was trembling, with severe shell shock.
Even the military fails to understand what happens to America’s young men who have been taught all of their lives,”Thou shalt not kill”, after they are trained to be killing machines and then aptly fill the job description for a tour of duty.
Americans must unite to reluctantly resolve to fight a broader world war with ISIS, for though America does NOT want war, WAR wants America.
America, is NOT at war, for America is busy shopping in malls; our military, however, IS at war.
Their souls are forever tainted, degraded and crippled by official legal murders.
How is one to understand?
Rather than wrongly judging that my father wallowed in these memories, he instead was surely drowning, within a deeper struggle, far removed from self pity.
Though he never once told me, within the recollections of the circle of my life, that he loved me, I found that I instead should have told him then, and often, that I loved him .
EPILOGUE:
Just before he died, at eighty-four, after a lifetime of no contact with him, I visited him at the Saint Albans Veterans Hospital Facility.
How I learned that he was there, is a paranormal story beyond belief, but one reserved for another time.
Even after a stroke and a heart attack, confined to a wheelchair, his bristling aggression and smoldering anger had still radiated.
He had angrily cursed God, when I did mention God, to him; he had repeatedly cursed God, saying that there was no God and as proof, offered me what he had seen, of the long ago mass murders of Jewish infants and children, by Ukrainians and Nazi Waffen S.S. troops.
He had repeated that because of raw evil allowed to run rampant, he was thus an atheist, one who didn’t believe a single word about God and then, he had openly cursed God, again.
I had chided him by saying that although God WAS all loving, that even God, might get annoyed, to be cursed so.
Slowly, I had realized an element of rescue,  a spiritual coup de’ grace; I had been driven by unseen forces, after twenty-five years of no contact,  to bring along to his bedside, a spiritual message to deliver to him.
I said that he was wrong; that the proof of God only seemed so invisible because it was too merged within our consciousness and within everything all around us, to be too easily detected.
I had told him that I had, over years of learning, away from him, become psychic enough to glean more:
that we are NOT people, having spiritual/ paranormal experiences, but are  undying spirits, within a DNA nanotech-contrived housing, instead, having human experiences.
That we ‘step out of’ our bodies at death, as we do our cars and our clothing, in physical life.
And we are no more our bodies, I had said, than we are our clothing, or our vehicles.
I had assured him that I had learned that our consciousness actually reincarnated often, to learn spiritual lessons, that God gives us many lifetimes to refine our souls and to learn lessons that we set out for ourselves.
With some pride, I had reminded him that his lifetime’s recollections of horrid war experiences, revealed a braver and nobler inner spirit, than most, to have chosen such harsh and horrid lessons.
He quietly listened, with no vague inkling of acceptance.
A week later, preparing to visit him, again, I got a phone call from the hospital that he had passed in the night from a second and final heart attack.
Some months later, while I was playing my bass guitar, (playing music, much like sleep, or hypnotic television watching seems to suppress my left brain’s blocking aspect, and paranormal experiences occur) in my living room, his face suddenly loomed into my mind’s eye and I suddenly felt his closeness.
Instead of an accompanying sad heaviness, his energy radiated a youthful joyous presence.
Stunned, I psychically acknowledged him, with love, but also with great worry; I cautiously admonished him for hazarding to linger so on this plane, and asked him to quickly jump into the Light.
His accompanying joy, a mixture of freedom from worry, from bedworn immobility, from war-time sadness, with an element of love and thanks, thrilled me.
Perhaps, I had I had been sought to deliver that message, to him, in much needed time.